A Modern Londoner Struggles to Keep the Prime Directive in Lost in Austen

I’ve been in an Austenish kind of mood lately, so when I heard about the 2008 miniseries Lost in Austen, I decided to check it out. The three-hour-long fish out of water tale finds Amanda Price (Jemima Rooper), a contemporary Londoner in her late 20s, stranded in her favorite novel, Pride and Prejudice, after its protagonist, Elizabeth Bennet (Gemma Arterton), discovers a doorway into her world in an upstairs passageway. Amanda knows this book by heart, but living in it isn’t exactly the fairy tale she’s dreamed about for so long in her mundane modern existence. Immersion in the early 19th century presents numerous challenges, not least of which is trying to follow what my Star Trek geekery compels me to call the Prime Directive. Amanda must not interfere with the way she knows the story is meant to unfold. But how can she avoid it when her very presence is an interference and when Elizabeth has made it impossible for her to return home?

This is a mostly entertaining twist on a classic novel that is probably best appreciated by those who have read it or at least (and maybe especially) have seen the 1995 miniseries. Writer Guy Andrews and director Dan Zeff seem to have great affection for Austen while at the same time wanting to bring their own twists to it. The miniseries looks very much like the 1995 one, with the same sort of attention to detail in costumes, landscapes and other aspects of the setting that root it so firmly in 1800s England. The sprightly score composed by Christian Henson is perhaps where the homage seems strongest.

On the other hand, bringing a modern woman into regency England stirs things up a fair bit. Hence, some characters proceed to act differently as a result of her presence or because of changes she has inadvertently made to the storyline, while in other cases, Andrews plays with the idea that some of these characters harbor secrets of which Austen herself remained unaware. No logical explanation for the connection between the two worlds exists; this is pure, unexplainable fantasy. It’s also unclear whether, at the end of the movie, the portal will become defunct or whether it will be possible for characters to navigate freely between 21st-century reality and 19th-century fiction.

Amanda is a fairly likable character, though I found myself a bit frustrated with her, first because, like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, she desperately yearns to escape to this other world but the instant she gets there, all she wants is to immediately return home. I mean, wouldn’t she want explore a little first? What’s more, despite her deep familiarity with the novel and her determination to let everything unfold according to Austen’s dictates, she doesn’t really seem to make too great of an effort to make herself inconspicuous. Some of her interactions with the characters she encounters are flat-out crass; if she’s so taken with the courtly manners of the time, she might try harder to adopt them herself.

On the other hand, we get her interior monologue, and usually her thoughts betray a deep love for these characters and regret that her own actions may be causing them grief. Additionally, she’s in a difficult spot because as far as she knows, the only way back to her flat is through the Bennets’ attic, so she has to stick around the one place where she is most apt to get into trouble. Her best qualities come to light in association with Jane (Morven Christie), the eldest Bennet daughter who is radiantly kind and gentle as always. When Amanda foolishly does something that sends Jane’s destiny spiraling into a ghastly direction, a desperate desire to restore her new friend’s happiness compels her to get more deeply involved.

The Bennet family comes across much the same as in the book. Hugh Bonneville is wonderful as the sardonic but twinkly-eyed Mr. Bennet, while Alex Kingston makes an acceptably over-the-top Mrs. Bennet. Lydia (Perdita Weeks), the youngest Bennet, is appropriately silly, while Florence Hoath’s Kitty is suitably nondescript. Mary (Ruby Bentall), the bespectacled middle daughter, is the only Bennet to veer significantly from the book, morphing from a self-righteous bore to a young woman who is plain and rather timid but perfectly amiable. Bonneville and Christie have the strongest presence of the bunch, and their characters serve as Amanda’s key anchors in this strange land by becoming her first allies.

What essentially happens here is that Amanda replaces Elizabeth, replacing her in the primary Pride and Prejudice storyline, albeit taking unusual turns here and there. Elizabeth herself spends the majority of the miniseries out of sight and mostly out of mind. While her spunk makes her desire to immerse herself in modern London understandable, the look of wide-eyed astonishment that is most often upon her face makes her seem almost too childlike. Meanwhile, her complete detachment from Jane after abandoning her, possibly with no intention to return, seems out of character for such a devoted sister. Really, though, we see too little of Elizabeth to get to know her very well.

It’s with the side characters that the most interesting departures come in. For instance, the disreputable George Wickham (Tom Riley) gains a more complex backstory, and the life of Charlotte Lucas (Michelle Duncan), Elizabeth’s level-headed best friend, takes a surprising detour. Guy Henry makes a positively slimy Mr. Collins, and the direction in which Andrews takes his character made me squirm the most, though a reasonably believable loophole is written into this part of the storyline to prevent it from becoming completely icky.

Probably to no one’s surprise, Amanda falls for the dashing Darcy (Elliot Cowan) despite concluding at the outset that he’s much better on the page than in real life and that Elizabeth is too good for him. Cowan broods his way through the role, mostly just coming across as a grump, and I didn’t find his more vulnerable moments sufficiently tender to make up for that. He’s certainly no Colin Firth. Tom Mison is better as Bingley, who I prefer anyway, but I like this version of Bingley less than any other version I’ve seen. In the beginning, he comes across as fairly shallow and fickle, while later, when he believes Jane to be forever beyond his reach, he becomes a belligerent drunkard. Despondent I can see, but belligerent? That doesn’t seem to fit.

Then again, Andrews takes liberties, perhaps trying to flesh these characters out and make them feel more realistic, less idealized. I don’t always like the directions he chooses, but it’s certainly an interesting exercise, and for the most part, I think it’s well done. I suspect that someone unfamiliar with Pride and Prejudice really would get lost in Austen here, and certainly those who know the story as well as Amanda does will get more out of it than the uninitiated.

As someone who was always a smidge more taken with Pride and Prejudice’s secondary couple, I love that Jane and Bingley’s romance moves to the forefront to become the most pressing of all possible pairings, particularly since, while Bingley leaves a little to be desired, Jane lives up to the book perfectly. While I could have done without the crudeness Amanda sometimes injects into this well-mannered world, I think most Austen fans will look upon this as an affectionate tribute and be inspired to ponder the potential repercussions of tumbling headlong into the pages of a beloved book.

The Bob-Whites Enter Mark Twain Country for The Mystery on the Mississippi

Since I started reading the Trixie Belden series in January, one thing I’ve enjoyed looking out for in each volume is literary references. Usually they’re sprinkled in here and there, bearing little importance to the overall plot, but in The Mystery on the Mississippi, the fifteenth book in the series, they’re a bit more integral.

In this volume, the ninth written by a ghost writer under the name of Kathryn Kenny, 14-year-old sleuth Trixie and her closest friends, collectively known as the Bob-Whites of the Glen, are on vacation for the fifth book in a row. Six of the seven Bob-Whites are able to participate in this trip. Naturally, Trixie’s best friend, Honey Wheeler, and her adopted brother, Jim Frayne, are along; after all, the primary reason for this vacation is business that Mr. Wheeler must attend to in Missouri. Also joining them are Trixie’s older brothers Mart and Brian and their neighbor, Dan Mangan, who doesn’t usually get to go on these trips. The only one missing is their neighbor, Di Lynch.

Any chance to go out of town is exciting for the Bob-Whites, but they have to reasons to be especially interested in this particular excursion. For one thing, they expect to be able to catch an exhibition of spaceships in St. Louis. For another, they will be in Mark Twain country. All of the Bob-Whites, it seems, have read and enjoyed the tales of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, particularly the Belden boys, and the thought of being able to see some of the places Tom and Huck visited makes them wild with excitement. The adventure abounds with nods to Twain’s classic companion books, particularly once the Bob-Whites finally make it to the town of Hannibal, the boyhood home of Twain and of the fictional Tom and Huck.

I think my first exposure to Mark Twain came in second grade, when my class staged a short play based on the scene in The Adventures of Tom Sawyer in which Tom cons several of his friends into whitewashing a fence for him. That fence plays a fairly significant role in the story, and several other landmarks make an appearance as well. What captures the imaginations of the Bob-Whites most of all, though, is the idea of traveling along the river in a steamboat like the one that inspired Twain’s pen name. In fact, they end up spending almost as much time on the water as on dry land in this outing, though it's not always as enjoyable as they expect…

Of all the Bob-Whites’ trips, this venture into Twain country is, perhaps appropriately, the most harrowing. Like Tom and Huck, the teens face genuine danger on and alongside the Mississippi River, thanks to some bad timing and a bit of poor decision-making. Trixie and Honey find themselves in some truly terrifying situations here, making for intense reading. Though they are in fundamental disagreement when it comes to their perception of certain secondary characters they meet in their travels and this leads to some problems, for the most part, Trixie and Honey support each other fiercely throughout their ordeal, and their devotion to each other is one of the most enjoyable elements of the book. They really have to be a team here, and their deep friendship serves them well.

It’s fun to watch the Bob-Whites geeking out over the opportunity to see Mark Twain territory for themselves, particularly during their time on the steamboat and in Hannibal. I did find Mart getting on my nerves a bit in this one, as he always seems to be impatient or complaining, though Trixie’s knack for stumbling into trouble does leave less time for simple sight-seeing so some frustration is understandable. All of the boys get a bit agitated at the thought that they might not be able to ride a steamboat – which doesn’t have anything to do with Trixie – but Mart seems to go above and beyond with his grousing. Also, this Star Trek fan feels compelled to point out that the narration incorrectly refers to a light year as a unit of time rather than distance, though we’re basically in Trixie’s head at that point, so perhaps it’s her mistake rather than the author’s. If she’d said it aloud and Mart had been there, no doubt he would have corrected her.

We seem to spend a lot of time in Trixie’s head in this book, with paragraphs of italicized text as Trixie has opportunity after opportunity to reflect on her missteps. Of course, this always comes after the fact; in the heat of the moment, when a decision must be made, she usually doesn’t have much time to think, and sometimes she’s not too bright. Then again, sometimes her companions aren’t either. Most of their mistakes in this book, however, come down to being too trusting, which is a reflection of their generous natures. This is especially true of Honey, though I was gratified to see her faith in the goodness of one of the characters ultimately be somewhat justified.

It was with some dismay that I discovered that I have come to the end of my steady stream of Trixie books from the library. Our system has only half a dozen of the remaining 24 books, so I will no longer be reading them in order, at least for a while. With book sale season upon us, I’m hoping to fill in some of those gaps before long. For now, though, The Mystery on the Mississippi is an adrenaline rush of an adventure that makes a nice conclusion to this stage of my Trixie immersion. With its scenic excursions, a ferocious villain, an oft-excluded Bob-White and more Mark Twain references than you can shake a whitewash-covered paintbrush at, I assert that missing The Mystery on the Mississippi would be a mistake.

Inception: "We're Gonna Have to Watch That Again"

Last summer, I heard a slew of reactions to Christopher Nolan’s mind-bending blockbuster Inception, most of them positive. Amidst all the praise, one “voice” particularly stood out to me: that of LOST co-creator Damon Lindelof. Two months after the controversial finale of his epic series, he was lighting up Twitter with his fanboyish ramblings, of which my favorite was this: “I wish that someone would break into my dreams and give me an idea HALF as good as INCEPTION.” No doubt there are many LOST fans who wish for the same thing – along with a time machine to furnish a more satisfying ending.

While I was one of the few LOSTies I know who pretty much got the finale I was hoping for, I both appreciated Damon’s self-deprecation and figured that was a pretty good endorsement of the movie. Having seen it now, I can understand why the guy responsible for my all-time favorite show connected with the film so strongly. One thread involves the resolution of deep-seated Daddy Issues, another the importance of “letting go”. A majority of the movie takes place during a flight from Sydney to Los Angeles. And boy, does it leave you scratching your head and saying, like John Locke in the scene quoted in the Addicted to LOST Superbowl commercial, “We’re gonna have to watch that again.”

I watched it again. The first time around it made some sense to me at times, but just as often I was hopelessly disoriented. But the second time around, it just clicked. I understood much better what precisely was going on in this strange world in which it is possible to break into someone else’s consciousness and manipulate his or her mind. I found it much easier to follow, and beyond baffling, I concluded that the film was quite brilliant. But I also felt like you’d have to be something of a genius to totally get it on the first viewing.

Inception stars Leonardo DiCaprio as Cobb, who specializes in extracting valuable information from poorly protected minds. It’s strange, wondrous and dangerous work, and it’s especially treacherous for him because of the personal issues plaguing his subconscious, manifested in the form of a beautiful but crazed woman named Mal (Marion Cotillard). Cobb has delved deeper into his own mind than anyone ever has, which makes him the best at what he does but also a liability. He needs a fresh new face to help him with his latest mission, an all-important job whose success could grant him the one thing he wants most in the world. This vital team member will design the dreams in which the work will be done. The opportunities for creativity are limitless, but closely mirroring reality is a must if they are to have time to complete their task before the artifice crumbles around them.

What Cobb needs is an architect, and he finds the perfect candidate in Ariadne (Ellen Page), a talented, spirited young woman who comes to understand the demons that drive him better than anyone else, even his longtime colleague Arthur (Joseph Gordon-Levitt). Having only seen Page in Juno before, I was struck by the difference in her here. There’s still a youthful naivety about her, but this is a more mature character, and even as she’s faced with a fantastical situation, she catches on quickly, delighting in pushing the boundaries of her new artistic range. Also in on this great task, which must be accomplished during a single flight, are Eames (Tom Hardy), a tough intelligence expert; Yusuf (Dileep Rao), who specializes in sedation; and Saito (Ken Watanabe), the Japanese businessman funding this project. The task: to manipulate Robert Fischer (Cillian Murphy), the young heir to a vast fortune, into breaking up his father’s properties so that his company will not control the majority of the world’s energy.

“Robert Fischer,” my dad commented when the character was introduced. “Like Bobby Fischer.” I don’t know if that was a deliberate nod or not, but it wouldn’t surprise me if the film intentionally alluded to one of the greatest chess players the world has known. Ariadne fashions a pawn for herself as a totem to help her keep track of her reality, so it wouldn’t be the only chess reference. This is a complex game that Cobb and his comrades are playing, a game of the mind in which every move is strategically planned and crucially important.

It’s a curious concept, since this is a movie packed with action, yet almost all of it happens while the characters are calmly sleeping. What does it matter if disaster befalls them within the dream? All they need to do is wake up. Actually, the film raises the stakes by making the matter more complicated than that, with heavy sedation posing a threat to the consciousness of each dreamer if he or she should fail to survive within the dream. Still, it’s odd to see all of this play out while realizing that it will have no impact upon the real world, unless it is in the form of an idea that develops within an unsuspecting mind and changes real-life actions. For all the car chases, gun battles and other harrowing situations, all that truly matters is planting that idea. Everything else is set-up.

As a Star Trek fan, I found myself reminded of both the original series episode Shore Leave, in which the thoughts of crew members spring to illusory reality on a mysterious planet, and the Holodeck in the Next Generation, which allows crew to construct their own virtual playgrounds and populate them however they wish. The special effects are amazing, with things occurring in this dreamscape that never could exist in real life. It’s certainly a feast for the eyes. And it is perilous. Far more than any threat of violence, the characters face the possibility of losing track of what is real and what isn’t, and that danger preoccupies this movie, with Cobb particularly susceptible to doubts about whether the dream is real and whether reality is a dream.

The acting is impressive overall, with Page and Watanabe making a particular impact on me. But it’s the dizzying structure of the movie, its intriguing discussion of the nature of dreams and the arresting visuals that really make the film a standout. I’m glad I watched it twice, and it makes me suspect that I should revisit other movies I didn’t quite get the first time around. Maybe it just takes a little extra mulling for it to sink in. Inception is a deeply puzzling movie, but it’s a puzzle worth trying to solve.

Sheldon and Penny Bring the Laughs in Big Bang Theory's Second Season

One of the things I love about January is the tradition my family has established of having TV on DVD marathons while my brother is still home from college. We kicked things off this year with season two of The Big Bang Theory, which I got him for Christmas. No sooner was the wrapping paper picked up off the floor than the flu hit us, and watching the exploits of uber-geek Sheldon Cooper, his three slightly less geeky buddies and his perky next-door neighbor proved the perfect convalescing companion.

Season two of The Big Bang Theory, the CBS sit-com created by Chuck Lorre and Bill Prady, begins with Sheldon’s roommate, Leonard Hofstadter (Johnny Galecki), navigating the uncharted waters of the aftermath of his first date with crush Penny (Kaley Cuoco). Of the main quartet, Leonard is the most down-to-earth, but he still has his fair share of social awkwardness, and when he learns why Penny is hesitant to go out with him again, he botches things badly. Hence, he spends season two just as hung up on her as in season one, but now that they’ve actually dated, an additional element of weirdness comes into play.

Since Leonard had his shot with Penny and feels like he blew it for good, we also see more of Leonard trying to make it with other women. Shy Raj Koothrappali (Kunal Nayyar), who morphs into Mr. Suave whenever alcohol enters his system, and skeezy Howard Wolowitz (Simon Helberg), who is always ready with an off-color pick-up line, also have their eyes on the ladies as before, though neither of them is too picky as to which one. While it seems to me that the second season is a bit less smutty than the first, four of the five main characters have amorous entanglements, and I usually found them pretty eye-rolling. Still, when romance comes into play in any given episode, it’s more likely than not that the would-be wooers will be thwarted, so even though I generally concur with Sheldon that their behavior is pretty silly, I can’t help feeling sorry for the guys getting rejected all the time and for Penny always managing to hook up with jerks.

While Penny and Leonard’s will-they, won’t-they romantic tension is a major thread throughout the second season, the much more compelling relationship is the entirely platonic friendship between her and Sheldon. Throughout this season, we see Sheldon take several more baby steps toward mastering the social conventions that have thus far eluded him, and Penny seems to be his most valuable teacher. Meanwhile, as she figures out how to deal with him, she finds herself unwittingly absorbing some of his interests. Penny is slowly becoming one of the guys, and whether we see her casually drop a Star Trek metaphor into a conversation or become hooked on Internet gaming, Sheldon is most often her doorway into that world.

All of my favorite episodes this season focus on that peculiar friendship. Penny isn’t the sharpest pencil in the box when it comes to intellectual pursuits, but she’s got a lot of common sense, and her blend of empathy and boldness means that she is both the only person in Sheldon’s life – aside from his mother, who lives several states away – who is willing to both coddle and stand up to him. The fact that Sheldon seems to be just about the only man Penny has ever met who is immune to her feminine charms allows a level of ease to exist between them that counteracts his obnoxious tendencies. I love seeing the two of them sing sea shanties together in an effort to mass-produce hair accessories and spend an evening in her apartment when Sheldon accidentally locks himself out of his. My favorite episode of the season, though, is the Christmas one, in which Sheldon is thrown into a panic when Penny informs him that she has a present for him. Seeing his consternation over the social obligation he has now been handed, his clever plot to give Penny something of equal value and, most of all, Jim Parsons’ Emmy-worthy reaction to her gift put this solidly in my list of favorite Christmas television episodes.

As before, Sheldon is the character who most captures my imagination. Yes, his rigidly regimented sense of order, whether it’s where he has to sit or what time he has to use the bathroom every morning, can be a bit much to take, and he never hesitates to lord his superior intellect over anyone nearby, including his brainy friends. Nonetheless, I can’t help finding Sheldon almost unfailingly endearing.  (I'm sure if he lived next door, my opinion might change...)  He may be a super-genius, but in many ways, he’s the most childlike character on the show. When he’s trying to master a new concept, he goes at it with the clumsy gusto of a kindergartener learning to read. He’s as uncomfortable with the idea of driving as I am. He wears his passions on his sleeves and never apologizes for them; his unfettered enthusiasm is infectious. Along with that, he seems physiologically incapable of telling a lie. While this means that he sometimes comes across as brusque, it also makes him refreshingly honest. Since he’s even more sexless than Spock, he has far more free time than his girl-chasing pals for more intriguing exploits like designing killer robots and concocting the rules to Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock. It’s also entertaining to see how oblivious he is to the world of hormones on those rare occasions when he manages to unwittingly arouse someone’s romantic interest.

As in season one, most of the interaction on the show occurs among the five main characters, but a few minor players do change things up. Abrasive colleague Leslie Winkle (Sara Gilbert) returns to infuriate Sheldon as she puts the moves on Leonard and, more surprisingly, Howard. The two also share a romantic interest in Stephanie Barnett (Sara Rue), a doctor whose attraction to Howard is limited to her fascination with the Mars Rover. Meanwhile, all the guys – except, of course, for Sheldon – lose their heads when Sheldon’s insistence upon taking a train to a conference leads to their sharing a compartment with Firefly star Summer Glau.

Penny goes through a series of insufferable suitors; the only rival for Leonard’s affections who is actually a decent guy is comic book store employee Stuart, played by always-awkward Kevin Sussman. This unlikely pairing really gets under Leonard’s skin, but Stuart isn’t much of a Romeo; all it takes is a hypothetical comic book argument from Sheldon to make him forget that he’s still on a date with Penny and might actually have a chance with her. We also finally get to meet Leonard’s mom, played with a severe detachment by Christine Baranski; while it makes us sympathize with Leonard for his affectionless childhood, it’s funny to see how instantly she and Sheldon take to each other as true kindred spirits.

While the first season of The Big Bang Theory is a lot of fun, the show really hits its stride in season two as Penny begins to get assimilated into the collective and Sheldon discovers that there can be more to life than logic. We’re already plotting getting our hands on season three…

Junior Fights Fear in Outer Space in Lost in Place

I’ve long been a fan of both Star Trek and Swiss Family Robinson, so it’s surprising to me that up until this week, I had never watched Lost in Space, the 1960s show about a futuristic Robinson family who have intergalactic adventures far from Earth. I finally decided to rectify that after reading Lost in Place, a picture book in the VeggieTown Values series. Written by Cindy Kenney and illustrated by Michael Moore, this story incorporates several popular characters from the VeggieTales series and uses them to illustrate a lesson about not being crippled by fear, which was also the subject of the very first Veggie video.

In this book, Junior Asparagus is playing hide and seek with his friend Laura Carrot. He hides a little too well, and she gives up on finding him, leaving him to finally emerge when it’s dark. Alone and afraid, he sees monsters in the shadows and is on the verge of full-blown panic when his parents manage to track him down. He is safe, but the experienced has so traumatized him that he no longer wants to leave the house. However, he consents to a trip to the bookstore with his parents so he can pick out something to occupy his interest for the afternoon.

Treasure Trove Bookstore is run by an Irish potato named Mr. O’Malley who has a knack for knowing exactly which book is needed for each situation. For Junior, he selects the saga of a family traveling through space unsure of how to reach their destination. As with the other books in this series, Junior is transported to the story, interacting with the characters and helping them to solve their problem.

The pictures have a flatter quality to them than the animation in a typical Veggie video, but the colors are vibrant and the nods to the series are creative. Larry the Cucumber is Don Quest, the enthusiastic pilot, while the Grape family, led by Pa Grape, is the Rattleson family, whose children share names with their Lost in Space counterparts, Judy, Will and Penny.

Accompanying them is a robot with a fish tank for a head and Dr. Smirk, a gourd with a very shifty look about him. I was unaware of the character of Dr. Smith on the show, so watching it helped me understand the inspiration for this character. Initially I wondered if he might be an homage to Spock, but sticking a Star Trek character in the middle of a Lost in Space spoof seemed a little out of place, and his personality isn’t very Spock-like.

As with the rest of the books in this series, Lost in Place is best appreciated by those familiar with the source material. Additionally, its plot isn’t quite as strong as the others in the series. Once Junior finds his own courage and convinces his new friends not to be afraid, they stop panicking, and everyone starts to think more clearly, which allows them to figure out what went wrong in the first place and formulate a plan for setting things right. It works, especially since it turns out their wayward journey started with a fearful action, but the connection might not be all that apparent at first.

Nonetheless, for Veggie lovers who are happy to let their geek flags fly, Lost in Place is a fun story with an encouraging message.

Sheldon Cooper Is a Spock-Magnitude Masterpiece in The Big Bang Theory

I am not an especially scientific person, but I’ve always had an odd attraction to fictional uber-geeks. Spock, the original Blue Ranger and LOST's Daniel Faraday are just a few of the eggheads who have won my affections. It was Spock who helped me discover another to add to this list.

It was the fall of 2008, and seemingly every time I flipped the channel to CBS, I saw a promo for The Big Bang Theory in which Sheldon, the brightest, most socially awkward of the main quartet of young scientists on the show, explains the rules to “Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock,” a more complex version of the traditional game. That’s supposed to make it more interesting, but naturally, once Spock is in the mix, everybody chooses the Vulcan, turning it into one big stalemate. I’d seen ads for the show before, but this was the one that hooked me, the one that convinced me to check it out during its second season. I’ve been a fan ever since. My brother Nathan bought the first season on DVD, and over spring break he brought it home, so I was able to catch up on everything I missed, so now I can consider my fandom complete.

Season one consists of seventeen episodes, each with a title that sounds like an oddball experiment or theory. For instance, The Luminous Fish Effect, The Middle Earth Paradigm and The Nerdvana Annihilation. Right off the bat, we are in introduced to the comedy’s five key players. Sheldon Cooper (Jim Parsons) and Leonard Hofstadter (Johnny Galecki) are roommates. Both are physicists, and both have a tendency to amuse themselves with things like Klingon Boggle, Halo tournaments and arguments over arcane bits of Marvel trivia.

But Sheldon resides in the upper stratosphere of nerdiness, so wrapped up in his own brilliance that he is both unwilling and unable to grasp even the most basic of social niceties. Leonard is a bit more down-to-earth, and when Penny (Kaley Cuoco), a beautiful, sweet-natured waitress moves in next door, he immediately develops a raging crush on her. Soon thereafter, we meet girl-crazy Jewish aerospace engineer Howard Wolowitz (Simon Helberg) and painfully shy Indian astrophysicist Raj Koothrappali (Kunal Nayyar). All four scientists work at Caltech.

Virtually all of the show’s humor derives from the interaction among these five characters. It’s fun when the guys get together and revel in their own nerdiness. For instance, in one episode, they are invited to Penny’s Halloween party, and each of them decides to go as The Flash. After they agree to wear different costumes, their choices range from Leonard as Frodo Baggins to Sheldon as The Doppler Effect. In another episode, Leonard buys the time machine from the movie of the same title, and the other three eagerly chip in for some time with the impressive prop.

I love it when the show focuses on the guys’ appreciation for science fiction and fantasy. I’m not so crazy about it when it the concentration is on their hormones. Sheldon remains utterly detached from the entire notion of romance, despite the fact that in one episode he unintentionally woos a date away from Raj. But the other guys are always bringing it up. Howard is the worst, always ready with a sleazy one-liner and obsessed with hooking up with pretty much any girl who will have him. While Penny generally enjoys the company of the other three, she shows consistent disdain for Howard. Raj, meanwhile, is quiet and sensitive, and throughout much of this first season he is physically incapable of speaking to a woman unless he is intoxicated. He’s much more likable than his best friend, but the two are rarely out of each other’s company, so if Raj is around, you have to put up with Howard, easily my least favorite of the quintet.

Leonard’s intense attraction to Penny is reminiscent of Niles’ obsession with Daphne in Frasier. There’s a similar dynamic between the two of them, with Penny the kind, salt-of-the-earth, attractive woman and Leonard the infatuated intellectual. The two quickly form a bond of friendship, and Penny’s genuine good will is what makes it so easy to root for the relationship. She has a habit of getting together with real dirt bags, and despite the major differences in their characters, you want to see her with a nice guy for a change, and for his devotion to her to be rewarded.

But it’s Sheldon who makes the show so riveting for me. A fascinating character brilliantly portrayed by Parsons, he is one guy who would have no trouble making sense of LOST’s time travel season. The gears in his head are always turning, allowing him to turn the most ordinary of objects into the inspiration for a head-spinning diatribe. Sheldon is hyper-intelligent, as well as just plain hyper. He has dozens of little ideosyncrasies, from the fact that he always has to sit in the same chair to his insistence on preceding each attempt to enter a room with a forceful series of three knocks and shouting the name of whoever he expects to be inside, and repeating the process until someone opens the door. On the one hand, intellectually speaking, he’s far ahead of even Leonard, Raj and Howard, but this is balanced out by his utter confusion with ordinary social conventions. It takes him most of the first season to begin to understand sarcasm, and empathy tends to elude him too, though in his own strange way, he proves to be a pretty devoted friend, especially, oddly enough, to Penny, who can never seem to decide whether she finds him infuriating or endearing.

All of the guys have issues with their mothers. We don’t meet Leonard’s in the first season, but she is a psychologist with a forceful personality whose methods have clearly scarred him a bit. Raj’s mother is occasionally seen via internet videoconferencing, along with his father, and they both try to control his life from afar, particularly in the romance department. Howard lives with his mother, and we’ve heard her voice in several episodes but never seen her. Their interactions consist of her bellowing at him from across the house.

Sheldon’s mother has made only two appearances on the show, one of them in the first season, but we also occasionally hear his side of a phone call with her, and he often mentions his upbringing in a conservative Christian home. While he and his mother have radically different worldviews, he does have a great deal of respect for her, and she is about the only person who can truly keep him in line. He also recalls her fondly in moments of distress. In one episode, he falls sick, and he yearns to replicate the conditions of his childhood, even asking Penny to sing the song his mother sang to him on such occasions. Sheldon becomes even more childlike when mentioning his beloved grandmother, whom he calls Mee-maw.

In general, I enjoy Sheldon’s background, but I’m very annoyed by the canned laughter that follows any statement his mother makes relating to her faith. None of the main characters is overtly religious, and logic-driven Sheldon clearly has no time for it, but I see no need for the outright contempt the show seems to display for Christianity whenever his mom is involved. Howard’s cracks about his own cultural heritage sometimes rankle too, but then so does almost everything he says.

So yeah, sometimes the treatment of religion on the show bugs me, and I would prefer a little less smut and a little less Howard in general. But as long as Sheldon is the show’s centerpiece, which he certainly is in the first season, I intend to keep tuning in.

Around Epinions in 80 Days: Blue Raspberry Gushers Are People! ... No, Not Really...

When I was growing up, there was a convenience store just down the street, and during the summer my brother and I used to walk down there a lot to spend our spare change on candy. Among my most frequent purchases were Bonkers and Zots, two types of candy that were one flavor on the outside and another inside. Bonkers were like two-flavored Starbursts, while Zots were hard candies with fizzy centers. It wasn’t until years later that I found Fruit Gushers, but it seems I was being primed to like them.

I’m not sure just when Gushers came along; I think of them as a sort of little brother to the Fruit Roll-Ups, also made by General Mills, that were so heavily advertised during children’s programming hours when I was a kid. Those, of course, were flat and usually came with punch-out shapes to increase the fun factor. Gushers, meanwhile, are hexagonal blobs. They remind me of the season two Star Trek episode By Any Other Name, in which an alien race reduces most of the crew of the Enterprise to small gray, many-sided blocks. Which, it occurs to me, is an unsettling, Soylent Green sort of thought... But that’s not generally on my mind as I munch these, thankfully.

Fruit Gushers are low in fat but very sugary, so they’re not really the healthiest snack around, but the pouches are pretty small, with maybe a dozen pieces in each. They come in bright yellow packages made of thick paper, and when you open them, it’s not unusual to find sticky residue on the inside and several Gushers clinging together. They’re chewy and come in a variety of flavors: strawberry, tropical, watermelon, kiwi, triple berry, apple and others. My favorite is probably the blue raspberry. I’ve always been partial to that flavor, whether it’s Jolly Ranchers or Skittles, and it’s very tasty in Gusher form, especially the juicy part in the center.

Gushers are so named because you bite down on the chewy outside and find liquid in the middle. If you don’t pop the whole thing in your mouth, you could end up accidentally squirting somebody when you chomp down. I find it rather fun to nibble a hole in the Gusher and then squeeze the liquid into my mouth by holding it tightly between my fingers. It’s also fun to toss it in the air and try to catch it.

This particular method helped inspire a (very) short film my brother and his friend made when they were in high school. His friend was such a fan of Gushers that we always kept a supply in the house, since at the time he came over a couple of times a week. In the video, he’s standing in the driveway eating Gushers, and he drops one. A dramatic countdown begins, and shortly after ten seconds is up, he nonchalantly picks up the Gusher and pops it in his mouth. And keels over. The moral: “Obey the 10-second rule.”

Clearly this snack has some morbid associations for me. Well, with a name like Gushers, what do you expect? The blue raspberry is likely to turn your teeth and tongue blue temporarily; spring for strawberry and you’d better be extra-careful not to spill, lest it look like you’ve been attacked. These are messy snacks, and after eating them, chances are you’ll want to wash your hands, since some degree of stickiness is almost inevitable. But I’ve been goony over Gushers since they started spicing up my high school lunches, and something tells I’ll never quite grow out of them.

James T. Kirk Is Ready to Command in This 1995 Hallmark Ornament

When it comes to picking a favorite character from Star Trek, I am definitely a Spock gal. This surprises me sometimes, since I am also a very emotional creature. But something about Spock’s serene, logical presence is extremely soothing, and while I often find myself frustrated with Captain Kirk when I watch the series, I seldom get aggravated with Spock. Nonetheless, a First Officer needs a good Captain, so every year, when I pull out the shuttlecraft ornament containing the voice chip of Spock addressing the Enterprise, I make sure his addressee is somewhere on the tree.

The 1995 Captain James T. Kirk ornament stands about four inches tall and two and three quarters inches wide. Kirk sits in his iconic chair, the cushion of which is black against a light gray setting. His left hand rests near a colorful controller, while his right hand is in a pensive, chin-scratching position. Captain Kirk wears black pants and shiny black boots. His uniform shirt is gold, with shiny accents on the rings around the arms and the insignia. He also has a black collar. The color on the figure is striking, and he looks quite realistic, though the lines between his shoulders and torso are so well-defined that it looks like his arms ought to move, and they don’t. His hands and smirky face are flesh-toned, and he has a thick head of brown hair. Attached to the top of the chair is a golden wire that ends in an ornament loop above Kirk's head through which to place the hook.

Captain Kirk sits nicely on a flat surface thanks to the one-inch circular base supporting the chair. If I weren’t so determined to have as much Star Trek as possible on our tree, I’d consider just sticking him on the piano instead, because the ornament is a little on the clunky side, and it can be tricky to find a branch that is large enough to support such a heavy ornament. Kirk has fallen off the tree on more than one occasion, though on the plus side, this hasn’t damaged him at all. The ornament may be slightly awkward, but it’s resilient. And unlike the shuttlecraft ornament, none of the paint has peeled at all.

Last year Hallmark came out with an ornament featuring Captain Kirk drowning in Tribbles. One of these days, I’d love to snag that one, which not only salutes one of my favorite episodes but also features nifty sound and motion. Mine is much more general and could apply to pretty much any episode. Sadly, there is no sound, motion or light embedded in this ornament, and there’s nothing Christmassy about it either, though making Star Trek Christmassy is a rather tricky thing to pull off without coming across as totally corny. So I don’t require a holiday message, but I do wish that Kirk said something. I also found it a little odd that on the back, the chosen “famous words” are “All I ask is a tall ship, and a star to steer her by,” which is from the John Masefield poem Sea Fever. Yes, Kirk quoted that, but it seems like it would have made more sense to include something he said more frequently, and that was more unique to him.

Despite a few quibbles, I love my Captain Kirk ornament, and I think most Trekkies would be glad to have it as well.

From the Shuttlecraft Galileo, Spock Encourages Fans to Live Long and Prosper

I have always been a fan of Star Trek, so when the original series began running in syndication again when I was in fifth grade, I was thrilled. Suddenly, it seemed like Star Trek was everywhere. That Christmas, my favorite commercial was the one in which Leonard Nimoy stopped into a Hallmark and patiently listened as the clerk enthusiastically described the new Shuttlecraft Galileo ornament. When her spiel was finished, the man who Is or Is Not Spock, depending on which autobiography you read, flashed her a gesture familiar to any good Trekkie. “Oh, I know, ‘Live Long and Prosper,’ right?” she gushed. “No,” Nimoy smiled. “I’ll take five.”

Undoubtedly Nimoy knew a lot more Trekkies than we did and had a lot more money to plunk down for Hallmark ornaments. But we did buy one, and every year it’s one of the ornaments I most look forward to hanging up. The ornament is inspired by the season one episode The Galileo Seven, which finds Spock, McCoy and Scotty, along with four redshirts, on a dangerous mission on board the titular shuttle. The episode first aired in 1967, while this ornament was released in 1992.

The ornament is simply the shuttlecraft, which is light gray in color, except for the underside and the nacelles, which are dark gray. The gold loop for the hook is the only thing on the flat top of the shuttle. The slanted front has three gray windows, “Galileo” in red script and “U.S.S. ENTERPRISE” in black print below that. The two sides are mostly identical to each other, with “Galileo” in the same red font near the front and “U. S. S. Enterprise” in the same black font near the bottom, surrounded by a red stripe. Above that is “NCC-1701 / 7,” also in the black print. The only difference between the two sides is that one has a double door. “NCC-1701 / 7” is also in black on the nacelles, surrounded by a red stripe. Along the back of the shuttle is a row of windows, this time actual holes rather than representations in paint.

After 17 years, the words have shown a little bit of wear, but it’s still easily readable despite the slightly speckly appearance. No part of the shuttle, which measures three and a half inches long and one and a quarter inches high, has broken. Of course, as much as I like the shuttle itself, my favorite element of this ornament is the “Magic Voice and Light!” promised by the box. Light-up features are always fun, but what I really love is hearing Spock’s voice coming out of the ornament.

Just plug the green plug into a Christmas light port and press the button, and you can hear him say, “Shuttlecraft to Enterprise, shuttlecraft to Enterprise. Spock here. Happy Holidays. Live long and prosper.” Now, one might argue that logical Spock would be unlikely to open hailing frequencies for such a frivolous statement. But this episode ends with the crew chuckling over Spock making a rather emotionally motivated decision, so it seems somewhat episode-appropriate. And if you really want to get silly, plug it into a string of blinking lights and hear his transmission break up (though the box instructions frown on this).

This ornament is large enough that it stands out but small enough that it’s not awkward to find a place where it will hang on the tree easily. And if you want to keep the shuttlecraft set up year-round, it stands easily on flat surfaces. I’ve admired many Star Trek ornaments over the years, and I’ve owned three. This one is my favorite. If you love Spock as much as I do, the Shuttlecraft Galileo might just be worth a trip to eBay or www.hookedonhallmark.com, where it is currently available for $10. Have a very prosperous Christmas!

Captain Picard Stands Tall in This 1995 Hallmark Ornament

When Star Trek: The Next Generation first began airing, I recall being a bit skeptical. This was a completely different crew, with none of the familiar characters I loved, and at first, I found it a little hard to warm up to them, especially since it seemed like they took things so seriously, particularly no-nonsense Captain Jean-Luc Picard. I soon learned to love this new set of officers, however, and I appreciated Picard’s more professional manner. He wasn’t going to get into the sorts of shenanigans Kirk did, and he certainly wouldn’t be as prone to seducing members of nearly every culture he came across. While Data quickly became my favorite character, I enjoyed Patrick Stewart’s regal bearing and am generally inclined to look upon Picard more favorably than Captain Kirk.

In 1995, Hallmark released an ornament each featuring Captain Kirk and Captain Picard. The following year, I received both of them for Christmas. While Kirk is seated in his chair, evidently on the brink of a big decision, Picard stands at the ready for action, about to enter the Bridge, unless I’m much mistaken. He stands inside an octagonal chamber, which is open at the back and the front, which is wider. The ornament is five and a half inches tall. At its widest point in the front, it measures three and three quarters inches wide, while it’s two and three quarters inches in the back. The chamber is beige, while inside it are squares of silver, with a red stripe surrounded by two black stripes in the middle on both sides. He stands on a blue trapezoid, which adds a nice bit of color.

The main feature, of course, is Picard himself. He wears shiny black boots and long black pants. His uniform shirt is also partially black, though the bulk of it is a deep maroon color. As with Captain Kirk, the lines between his shoulders and torso stand out, and it seems as though his arms should move, but he is entirely stationary. Upon his chest is a silver insignia atop a gold oval. Both of Picard’s arms lie at his sides, with his pale hands dangling down. His face wears a concerned expression; I especially like the detail on the mouth. The top of his head is quite bald, but a fair amount of silvery hair can be seen below his ears if you look at him from the back.

It’s obvious that Hallmark hoped fans would buy Picard and Kirk as a set; each of the boxes advertises for the other, and the basic idea of each ornament is similar. Hence, the two ornaments have basically the same strengths and drawbacks. It’s a good likeness, and it’s high quality; after 13 years, mine is still in excellent condition. On the negative side, while the ornament stands easily on a flat surface, it doesn’t hang from the tree as naturally, since it’s so tall. It’s difficult to find a branch that will support something so bulky, especially when it also means finding a branch somewhat removed from the others so that it isn’t constantly bumping into different branches.

As with Kirk, though, the main disappointment is that this ornament has no interactive elements. The quick list of stats on the back features “Make it so” as Picard’s “Famous Words,” and that seems a very appropriate choice. Why couldn’t we have heard it too? I would much rather have a sound chip in my ornament than blinking lights or articulation, but either of those elements would have been nice as well. Of course, they also would have made the ornament more expensive.

If you are a fan of Star Trek: The Next Generation in general and Captain Picard in particular, you might want to consider inviting him to adorn your Christmas tree. He seems to be fairly readily available online, so plunk down 11 bucks and make it so!

Lieutenant "Broccoli" Learns to Embrace the Real World in Star Trek TNG's Hollow Pursuits

Last week, I was doing some late-night channel surfing and happened upon Genesis, one of the few episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation featuring Dwight Schulz’s nervous, severely socially awkward engineer Reginald Barclay. I was excited to see the character, who I fondly remembered, mainly from season three’s Hollow Pursuits, which introduces him. When I looked that episode up, I was delighted to find that it would be airing on Thanksgiving night. The episode was just as charming as I remembered.

Schulz gives a performance that is extremely comical but also sympathetic. At one point in the episode, he confides in his immediate superior, the kind and competent Geordi La Forge (LaVar Burton), that he is the guy who always writes down things to say before he goes to a party, then ends up spending the evening in the corner studying a potted plant. For a wallflower like me, this poor fellow who has earned the whispered nickname “Broccoli” from his crewmates is easy to relate to.

Not only is Barclay a wonderful character, but Guinan, the serene bartender portrayed by Whoopi Goldberg who is probably my favorite occasionally recurring character on TNG, has a terrific heart-to-heart with Geordi during which she encourages him to show oddball Barclay a little empathy. She relates the story of her brother, the black sheep of the family, who had a fantastic sense of humor that no one else got a chance to appreciate because they wrote him off so quickly. When Geordi explains how unpopular he is with the rest of the officers, complaining that he’s never on time and is always agitated, Guinan responds that if she were surrounded by people who didn’t like her, she’d probably be late and nervous too. Geordi is a very nice guy already, but this conversation is an important aid in helping him give Barclay another shot.

Anytime the holodeck comes into play, it’s a treat, because we get to explore entirely different settings from the sterile starship, often with fancy costumes for those usually stuck in the same uniform all the time and with literary or historical characters springing to life to interact with the crew. One of my all-time favorite posters is the American Library Association’s one featuring the members of Captain Picard’s crew holding their most beloved books. This doesn’t seem like much of a stretch because the show frequently includes allusions to various literary figures, particularly Sherlock Holmes.

In this episode, we get the Three Musketeers, with Barclay programming his idyllic escape from reality with Picard (Patrick Stewart), Geordi, Data (Brent Spiner) as the famous swordsmen and Riker in the role of eager young D’Artagnan. All are accomplished duelers, but none can match the skill of Barclay, who, within his own little world, demonstrates none of his characteristic jitteriness. The Crushers (Gates McFadden and Wil Wheaton) and Deanna Troi (Marina Sirtis) also have amusing holoworld counterparts, and it’s especially entertaining to see how the real Geordi, Riker and Deanna react to them when they crash the program in search of Barclay.

This is an episode that seems very ahead of its time. Though it aired in 1990, it is the perfect cautionary tale on the dangers of getting too sucked into the Internet, particularly role-playing games. Sally Caves, who wrote the teleplay, seems to have anticipated the extent to which people could get drawn into this illusory world, particularly those who have trouble with real-life social interaction. Of course, the message could apply to any number of fiction-based entertainments, from books to Dungeons and Dragons. But it seems to fit the Internet especially well.

Hollow Pursuits is one of the funniest episodes of TNG, but it’s packed with meaning, with a lesson to the Barclays of the world not to retreat so far into their own imaginations that real life eludes them and to those who know such people not to let them feel so isolated that such pursuits seem like the only way to find peace.

Star Trek: The Next Generation - Genesis Is Completely Ridiculous, In a Good Way

So I was sitting in the living room, too tired to do anything productive, too awake to call it a night, and after one flatulence joke too many from Craig Ferguson, I grabbed the remote, whereupon I was reminded of that glorious, albeit inconveniently late, time slot during which Star Trek: The Next Generation is on WGN. So I settled in for Genesis, an episode I’d never seen before. It features one of my favorite minor players, jittery Lieutenant Barclay (Dwight Schulz), and it starts off with the promising scene of Data (Brent Spiner) undergoing a consultation regarding his pregnant cat, Spot.

Some of my favorite moments in the series involve this cat, including Data’s reading of his own poetic composition, An Ode to Spot, and his range of emotions concerning her fate in Star Trek: Generations, so I figured her appearance was a good sign. And who can resist the promise of kittens? Unfortunately, while Spot does play a key role in the plot, we see very little of her, and even less of her and Data together - and in one of those scenes, her appearance is decidedly different. In high school, I witnessed the taping of a commercial spoofing The Wizard of Oz that co-starred an iguana as Toto. The fact that it made no sense whatsoever added to the humor. It’s supposed to make sense that fluffy Spot transforms into an iguana before the episode is out, but it never really does. This is one weird episode. But it’s very entertaining.

I was surprised to see that Genesis originally aired in March. It definitely struck me as a Halloween episode, sort of Treehouse of Horror TNG-style. Beware the Ides, and beware the episode’s premise if you want to avoid scratching your head in confusion or shaking it in exasperation. The whole thing plays out like a spoof of cheesy horror movies as various members of the crew begin demonstrating strange behavior before undergoing startling changes to their physiology.

Deanna Troi (Marina Sirtis) becomes unbearably chilly; Will Riker (Jonathan Frakes) can’t hold onto his train of thought; hypochondriac Barclay becomes hyperactive. Most noticeably, Worf (Michael Dorn) becomes unaccountably surly, which is initially funny but grows worrisome as the episode wears on. Even Captain Picard (Patrick Stewart) is beginning to exhibit symptoms of paranoia. Data alone is unaffected, and it’s up to him to put on his Sherlock Holmes cap and figure out just what is going on.

Genesis goes in a much different direction than I anticipated. It’s one of the funniest TNG episodes I’ve seen, in a campier-than-the-original-series kind of way. I’m not sure it was supposed to be so silly, but really, once Deanna sprouts gills, it’s hard to take anything that happens in the episode too seriously. But boy, it sure made me chuckle...

My Top Ten Movies of the Late '80s ('85-'89)

The late 1980s were some of the most formative years of my life, as I headed off to school for the first time and experienced some major milestones, including gaining a brother and losing a grandfather.  The movies that I saw during these years really stuck with me.  Here are some of my favorites.

Back to the Future (1985) / Back to the Future II (1989) - For some reason, I saw the second installment of this classic Robert Zemeckis trilogy first, so that when I saw the first movie several years later, a lot of the jokes made a lot more sense. Each is much funnier in tandem with the other, but as stand-alones, they're great, too. Michael J. Fox is irresistible as Marty, the teenager who gets propelled backward then forward through time courtesy of Doc Brown, who is played to the eccentric hilt by Christopher Lloyd. Since LOST became preoccupied with time travel, I've been especially getting the urge to go back and watch these two movies, which so humorously examine all of the problems that might arise from such a feat. Extra kudos to Crispin Glover, who is a bundle of neuroses as Marty's wimpy dad, George, and Thomas F. Wilson, who perfectly portrays the brutish, dim-witted Biff Tannen and has forever lodged in my mind the phrase "Why don't you make like a tree and get outta here?"

Anne of Green Gables (1985) / Anne of Avonlea (1987) - These gorgeously filmed adaptations of the first few books in L. M. Montgomery's classic series are two of the first videos we ever owned - or I should say four, as both run well over three hours in length and require two cassettes each. We used to pop them in whenever we had my cousins over for a sleepover, as they made a very comforting backdrop, and if we were still up when the second movie was over, we could really consider ourselves champion night owls. Megan Follows is spectacular in the title role, especially the first time around when she gets to play Anne in her early teenage years to the over-dramatic hilt. But then every character is perfectly cast, from Colleen Dewhurst as stern but kind Marilla and Patricia Hamilton as busybody Rachel to Richard Farnsworth as incurable softie Matthew and Jonathan Crombie as the incredibly patient Gilbert. The first film is extremely faithful to the first book, while the second takes considerable liberties as it combines elements of the second, third and fourth novels. Both make for excellent, high-quality, wholesome viewing, not to mention some of the best advertising Prince Edward Island has ever gotten.

An American Tail (1986) / Land Before Time (1988) - I always think of these two Don Bluth films in association with each other. They came out within a couple of years of each other, and they both concern a young animal who is separated from his family making new friends as he undertakes a dangerous journey in hopes of an eventual reunion. The first features Fievel the mouse and his close-knit family, who happen to be Russian Jews, and it is a full-blown musical, with the earnest duet Somewhere Out There a particular highlight. While American Tail introduces kids to the immigrant experience, Land Before Time gives some background on dinosaurs while presenting a powerful tale of faith and friendship. Too many shoddy sequels followed both of these movies, but the originals remain outstanding.

Flight of the Navigator (1986) - Another time travel movie, this one about a boy who finds himself the navigator of a snarky ship carting dozens of aliens across the universe. Young David only jumps ahead eight years, but he's surprised to discover how many things have changed. There's an element of poking fun at the decade in this fun fantasy that is mostly about the unlikely bond that develops between the boy and the sentient spaceship voiced by Paul Reubens. It's been too long since I've seen it, but when I was a kid, I absolutely loved it.

Great Mouse Detective (1986) / The Little Mermaid (1989) - The former was the first movie I remember seeing in the theater. It's a little dark for Disney, focusing on a kidnapped inventor and a plot against the queen of England by a diabolical villain by the name of Ratigan. But I love this very English tale of about Basil, an arrogant detective, and Dawson, his faithful assistant, doing their best to avert a disaster for the sake of sweet young Olivia, the inventor's daughter. Most of the characters in this are rodents or other scuttling creatures, while The Little Mermaid features an array of aquatic characters and some incredibly catchy songs. Disney's twist on the Hans Christian Andersen tale is more upbeat and includes plenty of amusing sidekicks, most notably the world-weary Caribbean crab Sebastian, advisor to the quick-tempered but affectionate King Triton. I wasn't sure how much I'd like this one when it came out, but once I saw it I quickly became obsessed with it. Both are great examples of the magic of Disney in some of its most exceptional years.

Karate Kid II (1986) - When we were growing up, my brothers and I all took karate at one point, as did my dad. I suspect that a lot of folks did that in the '80s after cheering on Daniel, the east coast teen who moves to California with his mom and gets over his fish-out-of-water blues by striking up a friendship with his elderly neighbor, karate expert Mr. Miyagi. I love the movies, particularly because of Mr. Miyagi, who is such a wise and funny character. The second film is my favorite of the trilogy because it focuses primarily on him, delving into his past and using his example to teach Daniel and the audience a powerful lesson on the value of mercy and redemption. It also includes my favorite of Daniel's three girlfriends, whose relationship with him unfolds on screen with some help from a montage backed by The Glory of Love, perhaps the ultimate '80s power ballad.

Short Circuit (1986) - I've always had a soft spot for robots, whether it's Data in Star Trek: The Next Generation or R2-D2 and C-3PO in Star Wars, but Johnny Five may just be may favorite robot of all. The first time my family watched this movie, I was in the other room reading, and the sounds of laughter drew me to the television within minutes. It wasn't long before I was laughing too: at the malapropisms spewed by Fisher Stevens' perpetually befuddled foreigner Ben; at the lovable robot's inappropriate behavior as he insatiably seeks more input; at the incredulity of adorable Steve Gutenberg's Newton Crosby as he comes to accept that his creation has actually come to life. This incredibly quotable movie is one of the most hilarious I've ever seen, and it has moments of real tenderness as well. It introduced me to several terrific actors, and may it well have even sparked my fondness for Dr Pepper, which has long been my beverage of choice.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986) - Easily the most accessible of the Star Trek movies, this fourth installment is also by far the funniest, though the stakes are higher here than in any other. The fate of the entire planet is at stake, so it's up to the crew of the Enterprise to save world by going back in time and fetching a couple of humpback whales. Like Back to the Future, this movie toys around with the absurdity of time travel, but it saves most of its energy to skewer '80s culture while making our heroes look like a bunch of buffoons as they try to navigate it. Among the highlights are Kirk and Spock's disastrous trip to the aquarium and the conversation in the car that follows it; Scotty's attempt to interact with a primitive computer; and a hospital escapade that involves high speed, heaps of deception and an instant kidney. All that, plus a lesson in environmental consciousness makes this the only original Trek film that rivals The Wrath of Khan.

The Princess Bride (1987) - Every year at Christmas, we watch this with my dad's side of the family, laughing late into the night over jokes we've all heard dozens of times before, dialogue we've had memorized for a couple of decades. This movie has everything: fantasy, adventure, romance... Most of all, it has humor. Every other line is a quotable classic, impeccably delivered by a top-notch cast. Burly, lovable Fezzik (Andre the Giant), Spanish, revenge-driven Inigo (Mandy Patinkin) and short, demeaning Vizzini (Wallace Shawn) are particularly memorable among a host of entertaining characters. The decision to frame the story with scenes of a grandfather reading the book to his cynical grandson is the icing on the cake in this film that perfectly blends so many elements to create a masterpiece I will never get tired of watching.

Dead Poets' Society (1989) - I remember hearing about this movie when it came out, but it's the only one of the bunch I didn't see until many years later. We watched this in my eleventh grade English class, which was led by an unconventional teacher not so different from the man Robin Williams portrays. This film has a darker tone to it than anything else on this list, but it is inspirational in many ways, demonstrating the power that literature and an involved teacher can have in one's life. It also shows the danger of trying to exert too much control over one's children as they reach adulthood. One of Williams' finest performances, and my introduction to the terrific Robert Sean Leonard.

My Top Ten Movies of the Early '80s ('80-'84)

I like to poke fun at the music of the '80s, but movies are an entirely different matter.  I was a little too young to enjoy these movies when they first came out, but in the decade or so that followed, they became firm favorites that have lasted to this day.

The Empire Strikes Back (1980) / Return of the Jedi (1983) - What would an '80s list be without Star Wars? The second installment traumatized me, but it also introduced Yoda, who I adore and includes the delightful insult, "You stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf-herder!" Most fans seem to list it as their favorite of the series, and it was even referenced in a recent episode of LOST. My favorite, though, is the concluding chapter of the trilogy, with its powerful themes of family and redemption. And what can I say... I'm a fan of the Ewoks!

The Blues Brothers (1980) - Saturday Night Live can be pretty stupid, but this movie based on characters from the long-running sketch show is one of my favorite comedies. Yes, a lot of cars wind up totaled, but there's also a slew of cameos from the likes of Ray Charles and Aretha Franklin and some terrific performances, my favorite of which is the impromptu rendition of the Rawhide theme song. And the madcap adventure has a worthy purpose, as Jake and Elwood are "on a mission from God" to raise money to save the orphanage where they grew up.

Airplane! (1980) - More one-liners and bad puns than you can shake a stick at, and the visual gags are just as rampant. This is one of the silliest movies I have ever seen, but I love it. Some of the jokes are a little off-color, but most of it is just plain goofy, and no matter how repetitive it gets, I laugh every time. Leslie Nielsen and Peter Graves are particularly funny.

The Great Muppet Caper (1981) / The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984) - Both of these original Muppet movies are lots of fun. I'm especially partial to the first, which features a jewel heist and some very funny performances from Charles Grodin and John Cleese, but the second is terrific as well and is more in keeping with the established Muppet personalities, since Kermit and the gang are performers rather than reporters. There's also that fun sequence imagining the Muppets as babies, a precursor to the popular cartoon.

Superman II (1981) - I love Superman, and I'm particularly a fan of this movie, in which the world is threatened by the sinister Zod, who has arrived with two cronies ready to do some serious damage. Christopher Reeve is terrific as both bumbling Clark and impenetrable Superman, and his rescue of a child who takes a tumble at Niagara Falls is one of my all-time favorite superhero moments.

Annie (1982) - Don'tcha just love tomorrow? This optimistic musical is fun and cheerful, with the title character's spirit uplifting just about everyone she touches, all the way up to the President of the United States. A great rags-to-riches story with terrific songs and the hilarious performance by Carol Burnett as the tipsy, diabolical Miss Hannigan.

The Dark Crystal (1982) - One of Jim Henson's darkest projects, this film depicts a beautifully imagined world ruled by opposing entities. It's a haunting fable all about sacrifice and balance, with gorgeous creatures and landscapes and occasional touches of humor, most courtesy of the gruff Aughra and the Ewok-like pod people.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982) - This pensive film is basically tied with the fourth as my favorite Trek movie. It finds Kirk contemplating middle age while confronting two people he thought were out of his life forever and adjusting to his unexpected role of father. Ricardo Mantalban is deliciously over-the-top as the vengeful Khan, Scotty shows his emotional side after his beloved nephew joins the crew and Spock and Kirk share the most powerful moment in the entire series.

A Christmas Story (1983) / Mickey's Christmas Carol (1983) / A Christmas Carol (1984) - It was a great couple of years for Christmas movies. The first is the funniest, a cult classic that is nostalgic but snarky and is my brother's all-time-favorite Christmas flick. The second is the most kid-friendly, an adaptation of Dickens' classic tale that clocks in at under 30 minutes, casting Mickey as hard-working Bob, Donald as exuberant Fred and, naturally, Scottish miser Scrooge McDuck as old Ebenezer. The third, starring George C. Scott, is my favorite straightforward adaptation of the story. It's much more detailed than the Disney version or even the Muppet version, which is my all-time favorite. Scott is magnificent as Scrooge, and David Warner is truly moving as the best Bob Cratchit I've ever seen.

The Karate Kid (1984) - While the second installment in the trilogy is my favorite, I love the first movie too, and it includes most of the truly classic Karate Kid moments, from "Wax on, wax off" to catching the fly with the chopsticks. While it's exciting to see Daniel transform from a hot-headed fish out of water into a karate champion, it's his relationship with the wise Mr. Miyagi that really makes the movie so much fun to watch. 

My Top Ten Movies of the Early '90s ('90-'94)

I'm a child of both the '80s and the '90s, and many of my favorite movies come from those decades. In the first half of the '90s, I was between 9 and 13, and my pre-teen years were filled with some terrific cinema. These are my ten favorites. Give or take a few...

The Rescuers Down Under (1990) / Beauty and the Beast (1991) / Aladdin (1992) / The Lion King (1994) - Okay, so I'm totally cheating on this one because Disney could do no wrong in the early '90s. The sequel to The Rescuers rates just below the others only because it isn't a musical. I like it much better than the first; the animation of all that glorious Australian wilderness is fantastic, especially during the flying-on-the-eagle's-back sequences, and George C. Scott marvelously voices one of my favorite Disney villains. The last three all have amazing songs to go along with the brilliant animation and terrific stories. Beauty and the Beast boasts my favorite Disney heroine, Aladdin the most manic Disney sidekick ever and The Lion King my all-time favorite Disney opening sequence. I saw them all in the theater, and I have them all on tape. Disney doesn't get much better than this.

Ghost (1990) - Seems to me we bought this one on a whim at McDonald's for five bucks one time, and it quickly became a favorite, mostly due to the hilarious antics of Whoopi Goldberg as a crackpot psychic who can suddenly talk to dead people and the touching finale, which features a gorgeous orchestral version of Unchained Melody. Oh, and it's pretty darn romantic too.

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1992) / Star Trek: Generations (1994) - Neither is my favorite Trek movie, but I think Undiscovered is the first one I saw in a regular theater. I seem to remember it being sold out the first time we tried to see it and being so frustrated about it that I bought the novelization. It's a landmark movie since it's the last to include the full original cast, and it's one of the most philosophical of the Trek films. Spock has some great moments with his protege, and the scene in which Uhura must pass herself off as a Klingon is hilarious. And all that Shakespeare isn't bad either. Generations is the first to feature the cast of The Next Generation, and it probably is my favorite of their films, partly because of the prominence of Guinan (Whoopi Goldberg again), an uncharacteristically serene character who tended to be underused, partly because of the chance to bring the two greatest captains of the Enterprise face to face with each other, partly because of the idyllic quality of the Nexus scenes, but mostly because I absolutely love Brent Spiner's performance as Data, my favorite character, learns to deal with his acquisition of human emotions.

Far and Away (1992) - I'd never heard of this before we watched it in my eleventh grade history class, but I quickly fell in love with it, and shortly after we finished it at school, I insisted we rent it at home. My family loved it as much as I did, so it wasn't long before we bought it, and watching it has become a St. Patrick's Day tradition. I love the humor, the sweetness of the opposites-attract romance, the cinematography, the historical interest, the score, the cast and of course all those Irish accents, even if some of them are phony. It's a movie that my brother and I still quote to each other frequently, and no matter how many times I hear it was a flop, it will be one of my favorites.

Sister Act (1992) - This was a second choice when Mom and I saw it on our annual back-to-school shopping outing. We'd planned to see 3 Ninjas, but it was sold out, so we gave this a try even though Mom had an idea that I'd find it boring. Well, it was anything but. Whoopi Goldberg had me in stitches again, and I found the real nuns at the convent where she goes into hiding to be wonderfully touching as well as funny. This is the movie that introduced me to Harvey Keitel and the formidable Maggie Smith, as well as a lot of great Motown music. I was singing the sisters' hit renditions of those songs for days, and I couldn't wait to get this one on video. Awesome music, side-splitting humor and a moving story of redemption. And nuns! What more could I ask for?

Free Willy (1993) - I saw this one on the next year's back-to-school outing and loved it just as much. I've always been a "save the whales" kind of gal, so I liked the premise, and I found the characters endearing and the film surprisingly free of objectionable material. A tough-on-his-luck kid name Jesse abandoned by his mother gets a new shot at life thanks to a similarly alone orca, his understanding trainers and a couple who want to welcome Jesse into their home despite his issues. It's a heartwarming movie, and that shot of Willy leaping over the barrier is as iconic as E. T. and Elliot flying across the moon. And its theme song, Will You Be There, still stands as my all-time favorite Michael Jackson song.

Angels in the Outfield (1994) - Probably my favorite sports-related movie, this film about a boy whose prayer for divine assistance for his favorite team is motivated by a desire for a family is a great tale of friendship and faith. Christopher Lloyd is his usual zany self as the main angel with whom young Roger communicates, and I love Danny Glover's performance as the cranky coach who begins to reassess his worldview when his team suddenly starts winning. The angels provide some terrific visuals as they help the players pull off some amazing stunts, but what I really love are the ways in which a little bit of faith transforms the characters for the better. And the image of the crowd standing en masse and giving the angel signal is one of my favorite movie moments.

Forrest Gump (1994) - I remember hearing about this movie on Good Morning America and thinking it looked interesting but probably wasn't a movie for kids. It stayed in the theater for ages; it seems inconceivable to me now that a movie could have lasted in the cinema for nearly a year, but I saw it in April of '95 with my mom and grandparents, the only movie the five of us have all seen together in the theater. And I really got what all the fuss was about. Tom Hanks is absolutely pitch-perfect as Forrest, a Bear of Little Brain But Much Heart. He might be a little slow, but it doesn't stop him from making his mark in a multitude of ways. Hanks' performance, an outstanding (and very quotable) screenplay that is as touching as it is hilarious, impressive special effects planting Forrest into historical footage and a soundtrack featuring a couple dozen of the best songs of the sixties and seventies are just some of the reasons I love this movie. I can't go more than a couple of years without watching it; from the moment Alan Silvestri's delicate feather theme begins to play, I am transported. I simply cannot watch this movie without emerging feeling a little better about life.

A Fine Bunch of Movies in 1999 Bring the Century to a Close

I graduated from high school and started college in 1999. In the midst of my busy year, I managed to see a few movies. I'm surprised at how few movies from the year I've seen in the decade since, but I think I got around to seeing most of the ones I was really interested in, and a couple of my favorites of 1999 would easily make it onto my best of the decade list.

October Sky - This movie, based on a true story, introduced me to Jake Gyllenhaal, and it's probably my favorite of his roles so far. Here, he's earnest young Homer Hickam, who dreams of building a rocket, despite the disapproval of his no-nonsense dad, played by Chris Cooper. It's a great family film about overcoming obstacles to achieve one's dreams.

Star Wars: Episode One - The Phantom Menace - Yes, Jake Lloyd was pretty annoying as mini-Anakin, and some of the dialogue was just silly. But I felt like a true dyed-in-the-wool Star Wars geek when I went to the midnight premiere with my dad and brother in the last month of my senior year, and it sure was fun to see my fellow geeks crawl out of the woodwork and announce themselves just before we parted ways. I loved the light-hearted feel of this movie, the gorgeous seascapes, the exciting pod race, the return of old friends like R2-D2, C-3PO and Yoda and new faces like the lovely Natalie Portman, brooding Ewan McGregor and contemplative Liam Neeson. It was a really terrific movie experience. And Weird Al's fantastic American Pie parody, The Saga Begins, makes me even more favorably inclined toward it.

Tarzan - One of the few major animated Disney features of my lifetime that I didn't catch in the theater, this story of a young man raised by gorillas has elements in common with The Jungle Book, but in this case the civilized join the jungle instead of the other way around. Though I find Jane rather irritating, I love her relationship with her dad, which is reminiscent of Beauty and the Beast. The animation is great, and while I tend to prefer character-oriented songs in Disney musicals, the more background-ish songs Phil Collins provides for the movie are terrific, and I always smile when I hear one of them on the radio.

Muppets From Space - As Muppet movies go, this one is a little strange, and somewhat controversial among fans for the unconventional backstory it creates for Gonzo. There are a lot of characters and subplots, and there's not much of an opportunity for the Muppets to demonstrate their musical genius. But it's always fun to hang out with the Muppets, and I know I had a great time when we saw this in the theater. Along with the established characters, I loved the crotchety antagonist played by Jeffrey Tambor as well as the burly bear who serves as his reluctant henchman.

Angela's Ashes - Somehow, I never did read the Frank McCourt memoir upon which this movie is based, but after finally seeing the film a couple years ago, I was reassured that I really need to do that sometime. The movie tells the gritty but inspiring tale of the author's impoverished youth in Ireland and how he escaped his dire circumstances to pursue a teaching career in America. We watched it on St. Patrick's Day, but it's definitely worth a look any time of year.

Pokemon: The First Movie - It's not exactly superior cinema, but I recall this one fondly as an icon of my time with my brother Nathan that year. I was a bit befuddled when he first became obsessed with the Japanese series that was taking America by storm, but he soon got me hooked, and we spent many an afternoon watching the cartoon together. Eventually, he and our neighbor also taught me how to play the rather involved card game, which led to me spending way too much money on supplementary packs whenever we went to the mall. I was a full-fledged fan by the time the two of us saw the movie in the theater, and I reveled in both the cheesiness of the dialogue, especially on the part of demi-villains Jesse, James and Meowth, and the touching message of brotherhood that it espoused. And adorable, electrically charged Pikachu. Sooo much Pikachu...

Toy Story 2 - I tend to be a little suspicious of sequels, especially those put out by Disney. A lot of them aren't really up to snuff. But this fantastic film by Pixar was every bit as good as the first buddy flick that so dramatically introduced computer animation to much of the populace. The first was about two very different characters overcoming jealousy and learning to work together. The second has more to do with the fear of obsolescence and dealing with the changes that come with the passing of time. It's both darker and funnier than the first, and the animation quality is even better.

Galaxy Quest - As a lifelong Star Trek enthusiast, I just loved this film that spoofs everything about the show and especially its fandom. Tim Allen is hilarious as the egotistical actor who played the captain on the Trek-like show a number of years earlier. He and his castmates now subject themselves to conventions and other rather degrading events, since they can't find work anywhere else. Though they're all sick of these roles, they find themselves having to do the acting jobs of their lives when a group of peaceful extraterrestrials welcomes them aboard their ship, seeking aid from the heroes whose adventures they have studied so carefully, believing them to be "historical documents." There's a constant battery of jokes aimed at those who have grown up with Star Trek, so it's ideal for Trekkies who don't take themselves too seriously. Great performances all around, especially the fantastically dry Alan Rickman as the world-weary Shakespearean actor who hates being reduced to a catch-phrase.

The Green Mile - One of my two favorite films of the year. I wanted to see it when it first came out, but it took me a couple of years, in part because the length and Stephen King scared me off. I've come to consider myself quite a fan of King, but I usually can't stomach his stories; I don't do horror as a rule, and King is king in that genre. But The Green Mile hardly qualifies. Yes, there are elements of both the violent and the supernatural here, but mostly it's a contemplative and deeply moral film. Tom Hanks stars as the warden of death row in a southern prison. He and his fellow guards are calm and fair, treating their prisoners with dignity, with the result that they have few problems among their prisoners. But the arrival of a psychopathic prisoner, a sadistic guard and a meek alleged murderer named John Coffee who, despite his enormous size, doesn't seem capable of harming a fly, mark a season of great change for these guards. Moving and thought-provoking with an excellent cast, it's an outstanding film, and after reading the book, I can say that it's one of the most faithful adaptations of a novel that I've seen.

The Sixth Sense - As much as I loved The Green Mile, I wasn't entirely surprised; I'd heard that it wasn't really a horror movie, and I knew that King had written things before that weren't entirely terrifying. But all I had to go on with The Sixth Sense at the time I saw it were trailers that were designed to make it look as creepy as possible. I watched it under duress, planning to bury my head behind my popcorn for most of the movie. But gradually, I found myself drawn in, and by the end of the movie I realized that this hadn't been a horror movie at all. A thriller, yes, but that's an important distinction. I loved the twist ending, the compassionate solution to Cole's problem, the touching relationship between Cole and his mother. But mostly, I loved Haley Joel Osment. I'd seen him before, in Forrest Gump, but I didn't realize it at the time, and anyway his part in that movie was too small to make much of an impression on me. But boy, is he amazing in this movie! With this film, he hooked me for life. Which makes it very distressing that he hasn't been in a movie in several years...

One of these days I'll rent a batch of movies from 1999 and see if my list needs to change a little, but for now, I'm quite content with these selections, especially the last two, which haven't lost any of their luster in the past decade.

Trek Proudly With Toy Factory's Plush Scotty Doll

Shortly after Star Trek came out in May, I was delighted to find a talking Spock bobblehead. He was one of four, but I had no great desire to purchase Captain Kirk or either of the one-shot aliens that had also been given the bobblehead treatment. I wished that other characters had been selected instead, especially Scotty and Bones. I'm still on the lookout for Dr. McCoy, but thanks to a lucky block sale find, I can now check Scotty off my list.

I was perusing a table full of oddities when I spotted him out of the corner of my eye, lying on a blanket in the grass. I saw the insignia first, and I knew I'd want him whoever he was, because how often does one stumble upon a foot-and-a-half-tall plush Enterprise crew member for fifty cents? But a quick peek at the red shirt and the expression of consternation told me that this was Montgomery Scott, galaxy-class engineer. Either that, or a random red-shirt about to be pulverized by some hostile alien being. But a peek at the tag confirmed it. I had my Scotty.

I find it rather sad that poor Scotty must be frozen into a permanent state of aggravation, but given that most of his catch phrases - "I canna change the laws of physics!", "I'm givin' 'er all she's got, cap'n!" and the like - involve perilous situations, it seems like an appropriate choice. I wish that Scotty, like Spock, could talk; would it have been that hard to stick a sound chip into his hand or behind the gold insignia on his uniform shirt? Half the fun of the character is his Scottish accent, but you just have to imagine it, or provide it yourself.

Scotty has big black shoes and black pants, and his shirt is red with gold trim and a black collar. The pants seem to be made of felt, while the shirt and shoes look like nylon and don't attract pet hair so easily. Scotty's flesh-colored hands and black hair are the same material as the pants, while his flesh-colored face and ears are the same as the shirt and shoes. His facial features are purely two-dimensional, with thick lines forming his mouth, nose, eyes and eyebrows and thinner lines helping to accentuate how stressed out he is.

Scotty is just large enough that he makes a good stand-in for a teddy bear, especially on trips, where his presence is likely to inspire laughter. I brought him camping with me, and upon my return to our small cabin, I discovered that my friend had left him dangling by one foot from the top bunk, giving him a good reason for that grimace. I haven't removed his tag yet, but once I do, I'm sure he'll be even more cuddly. I expect the same is true of solemn Spock and smirking Kirk, the other two characters in this line.

I was surprised to find out that they'd been released in 2009; what would prompt his young owner to toss him in the yard sale so quickly? Maybe he was a gift from someone trying unsuccessfully to turn the kid into a Trekkie. In any event, he cheerfully said, "Oh, that's mine!" when he spotted Scotty in my arms and rushed off to get me a bag. So I think he was much more excited about gaining fifty cents than upset about losing the greatest engineer Starfleet has ever known.

If you're a Trekkie looking for a fun addition to your bedroom, you might want to look into Scotty or his commanders. I've never seen them in stores, but they seem to be pretty easy to come by on eBay and Amazon, where you can expect to pay $10 to $15 each for them. A note on my tag promises, "More beaming down soon!" so perhaps all seven of the major crewmembers will be pillows before long. So far, I've seen no evidence that this Toy Factory line has expanded, but if Bones turns up, I might have to think about giving Scotty a buddy. Till then, perhaps my Tribble would be appropriate company...

Celebrate Star Trek With Bobblehead Spock

Last week, Star Trek, probably the one movie this year I was most looking forward to, came out in theaters. I've been a Star Trek fan for as long as I can remember and have always been especially fond of logical, selfless Spock. I made the trip to Burger King last week hoping to nab a Spock glass and kids' meal toy; neither was available at the time, so my quest continues. But on Friday, I stumbled upon a Star Trek display in Hollywood Video and discovered an even cooler trinket: a talking Spock bobblehead.

We have a couple of bobbleheads scattered across various shelves in our house. Former Governor Tom Ridge sits cheerfully near the computer, the result of a peculiar baseball game giveaway. Davy Jones, rescued from the Spencer's bargain bin, grins over my desk, tambourine in hand. It's probably no big loss that Ridge comes unequipped with a sound chip, though I'd love to hear Davy burst randomly into Daydream Believer. Alas, he's perfectly silent, but not chatty Spock. This half-Vulcan Starfleet officer has plenty to say.

Spock comes in an attractive cardboard box that discusses his character traits. The bobblehead itself is mounted on a light brown plastic platform on the front of which "SPOCK" written on a small plaque, next to a Starfleet insignia. Spock is made of sturdy plastic, with black shoes and pants and his blue uniform shirt. His right hand is molded into the "Live Long and Prosper" gesture, while his left is balled into a fist. Both of his hands are articulated at the shoulders. The serene face with the jet-black hair and arched eyebrows bears more than a passing resemblance to Leonard Nimoy, whose voice emanates from the figure, and the ears are appropriately pointed.

Spock has three phrases in rotation: "Fascinating," "Live long and prosper" and "You are, after all, essentially irrational." Three seems like a good number; it's also how many phrases most of McFarlane's LOST figures have. (I can't understand why they waited until after the line was cancelled to heavily promote the figures via the oddball LOST Untangled mini-films in season five...) As with most of the LOST figures, I think one of the quotes is less iconic than others. The "irrational" quote is the longest, and it sums up Spock's attitude well, but as a catch-phrase I would be more inclined to expect "illogical". Still, minor quibble.

The idea with this bobblehead is that you set him down and give him a few taps on the head to set him bobbling, which triggers the sound chip. There's no set-up involved, which is a relief after all the annoyances I went through with the LOST figures. But you also can't just press a button to get Spock going, and just because his head is bobbing, it doesn't necessarily mean he'll talk. More notably, he has a habit of piping up at the most unexpected of times. For a couple of days, we had him sitting on the microwave, and almost every time we closed the door, we could count on commentary from him. Now, he's migrated to a less sensitive location, but every once in a while, completely out of the blue, we'll hear "Fascinating" or "Live long and prosper". I find the randomness hilarious, but if you like absolute control over your talking toys, you may not be so amused.

Online, seven-inch-tall Spock, weighing in at about a pound, goes for twelve dollars; I bought him for ten. As far as I can tell, there are four Wacky Wobblers in this series: Captain Kirk, which is certainly expected, but also, as another testament to these toys' randomness, the reptilian Gorn and blue-faced Andorian. Both are among the most identifiable aliens in the original series, but they're not exactly significant characters, and they don't have anything to say either. Perhaps this is an ongoing line, and there will be more; otherwise, I can't understand why Funko didn't make Scotty and Bones instead. And if they're going to have those four, why not go all the way and include Uhura, Sulu and Chekov? It's probably just as well for me, though, if they stop the line where it is; I can resist Kirk, the Gorn and the Andorian, but I don't know if I could say no to the rest of the crew. I'm already in trouble since my trip to Amazon revealed that this summer, a deluxe electronic Kirk-in-the-command-chair-surrounded-by-tribbles action set will be released. Curse you, Amazon, and your dangerous suggestions! Must... not... buy.

But I did spring for Spock, who is both much cheaper and much more compact. And given the laughs he's provided in just a week, I'd say it was well worth it. This bobblehead might not be logical... but it certainly is fascinating.

Beam Aboard the Starship Enterprise With Zachary Quinto and Company

This weekend, two of my all-time favorite televisions shows are united on the big screen. LOST creator J. J. Abrams helmed the 2009 theatrical reboot of Star Trek, perhaps my most anticipated film of the year, bringing with him fellow LOST head honchos Damon Lindelof and Bryan Burk, along with composer Michael Giacchino and Greg Grunberg, whose part in the film, while even tinier than his brief turn as the doomed pilot of Oceanic 815, is certainly memorable, though you'll probably have to consult the credits to figure out who he is. I watched Star Trek regularly with my family when I was growing up, and Spock was one of the first fictional characters I came to adore whole-heartedly. No matter who was involved in this movie, I would have been standing in line on opening night, but the LOST connections sweetened the deal.

From the time I first heard about this new Star Trek, I was pleased by all the attention being lavished upon Spock but slightly nervous about the casting, since Zachary Quinto also plays Sylar, who sadistically sliced open many an unsuspecting head on Heroes before I gave up on the series. I imagine the reason for Quinto getting so much of the spotlight is two-fold: in full regalia (including, of course, the pointy ears), he bears an extraordinary resemblance to the original Spock, and the logical half-Vulcan - the only holdover from the show's first pilot - really is the glue that holds Star Trek together. The more I saw of Quinto's Spock in magazines and late-night interviews, the more I embraced him as Leonard Nimoy's successor, so that by the time my latest issue of Entertainment Weekly arrived with a cover bearing a crystal-clear headshot of New Spock, I could gaze at it enthralled and not be remotely reminded of the hated Heroes villain.

Still, looking the part and acting it are two different things, so I reserved total acceptance until the movie, in which Spock is every bit as central a character as I'd hoped. Quinto's Spock has slightly less control over his emotions than Nimoy's; for the most part, he is the same calmly detached officer, a cool voice of reason rising above the flaring tempers among his crewmates. But there is conflict within him, and never are his human emotions so strongly roused as in matters concerning his mother. The tender relationship the film presents feels like one of many throwbacks to Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. Spock, it transpires, is a bit of a mama's boy, but that doesn't stop him from being one of the most brilliant minds Starfleet has ever known.

Quinto conveys each subtle inflection of his genius masterfully while keeping us aware that Spock's feelings are submerged rather than nonexistent. Speaking in a gentle but authoritative tone, he is polite and precise and, when the occasion calls for it, droll. And thankfully, writers Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman give him plenty of compelling material, not to mention opportunities to whip out many Spock trademarks, including the Vulcan salute, nerve pinch and mind meld and the acknowledgement that something is "fascinating".

Spock also lifts quotes from specific moments in the series and subsequent movies, my favorite of which is the touching "I have been, and always shall be, your friend." This line is uttered not by Quinto but by Nimoy, whose appearance midway through the film is the audacious anchor upon which the plot rests, allowing Abrams wide creative license as he proceeds with the series. The movie is loaded with references meant to appease long-time fans, but Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan offers especially integral inspiration for the plot, from the revenge-driven crusade of tattooed Romulan Nero (Eric Bana) to the unpleasant interrogation method he uses. The nod that excited me the most involves a cocky young James Kirk (Chris Pine) taking a casual bite out of an apple as he takes the Academy's no-win scenario test for the third time.

The movie is hardly a collection of catch-phrases, but each of the major seven characters gets some time in the limelight, and there were cheers in my showing each time the officers uttered a familiar command or exclamation. Keep an ear out for Kirk saying, "Beam me up"; communications officer Uhura (Zoe Saldana) opening hailing frequencies; helmsman Sulu (John Cho) putting the ship into warp speed; ensign Chekov (Anton Yelchin) talking about "wessels" and "Wulcans"; engineer Scotty (Simon Pegg) bellowing, "I'm givin' it all she's got!" and Dr. McCoy (Karl Urban) snapping, "I'm a doctor, not a physicist!" Keep an eye out, meanwhile, for a man of little consequence dressed all in red and a surprising song credit rewarding longtime fans who stick around after the movie is over. Even with my eyes peeled, I missed the cameo of late Last Lecture author Randy Pausch, an avowed Trekker, early in the film; I'm sure that the next time I watch it, I'll catch plenty of other Easter eggs too.

Fans should be pleased with all of these opportunities to prove their prowess, and newcomers aren't likely to be distracted by them. While they miss the fun of the in-jokes, they have the advantage of not constantly comparing new with old and wondering whether these incarnations are betrayals. I have little issue with the acting in terms of these characterizations. More eyebrow-raising are some of the details written into these characters' histories and personalities. The aforementioned critical plot point explains some of the discrepancies, but there's also an extent to which these characters are being reinvented.

This is most evident in the cases of Uhura, Sulu and Chekov, whose personalities were always less developed than the other four. Saldana, who I first saw as an unabashed Trekker in The Terminal, makes sweet Uhura quite a bit feistier, especially in run-ins with Kirk. I appreciate the emphasis on her smarts but found it annoying that demure Uhura evidently wasn't good enough the 21st century. However, I like her much better once she gets on the ship, at which point another surprising aspect of her character emerges. It gels more with the tender, compassionate woman Nichelle Nichols played, and mostly I'm okay with it, though it strikes me as a controversial direction to take. Cho lacks the vocal gravitas to have me entirely convinced that he's Sulu; of the main seven, he's the only one whose casting I question. His role is mostly light, and while he does contribute in important ways on a couple of occasions (I especially like the way his established fondness for fencing is integrated), he seems a little greener to me than he should. Chekov, meanwhile, doesn't seem green enough. In the original series, I tended to think of him as capable but ultimately little more than comical eye candy. This time around, he's a Wesley Crusher-esque wunderkind, just as funny and adorable as always but considerably more indispensable. Of the three second-tier characters, he is my favorite, both then and now.

I had doubts about Karl Urban as the irascible Bones, since I previously knew him as Eomer, who I found just about the most boring character in Lord of the Rings. Then again, he didn't make much of an impression on me in the book, either, so I wasn't sure if that was really the actor's fault. Bones gets almost as much screen time as Kirk does, particularly toward the beginning, and thankfully, my worries were unfounded; he absolutely nails the good doctor's drawl and good-natured crankiness and gets many of the movie's biggest laughs. Particularly funny, especially considering classic Kirk's unending aversion to Sickbay, is the sequence in which he chases Jim around the ship, attempting to administer a series of unwanted treatments. It feels most appropriate that the film establishes the two as firm friends long before they serve together on the Enterprise.

Hot-headed, libidinous Jim Kirk was always my least favorite of the Enterprise Seven. He may have been brave and heroic, but his lack of respect for authority and his arrogance always got on my nerves. Unsurprisingly, the early-twenties version is even more obnoxious. Like everyone else besides Quinto, Pine bears no especially striking physical resemblance to his predecessor, but he captures his mannerisms well. I also have to offer kudos to the writers and young actors alike on the scenes depicting Kirk and Spock in childhood. Rabble-rousing Kirk's (Jimmy Bennett) is hilarious, exhilarating and the first of several action sequences that seem inspired more by Star Wars than Star Trek. Contemplative Spock's (Jacob Kogan) stands in stark contrast, though it also demonstrates the half-Vulcan's struggle to come to terms with his opposing natures, exemplified by an amusing exchange with some older students causing my brother to exclaim, "Spock's bullies would get beat up by the bullies on any other planet in the universe!" Instrumental to Kirk's development this time around is Captain Christopher Pike (Bruce Greenwood), whose stern but kind mentorly role I love. Greenwood seems a little on the old side to be playing this captain who was in command in the show's original pilot, but the relationship feels believable.

That just leaves Pegg's Scotty, who takes so long to turn up I started to half-wonder if we were going to see him at all. Our introduction to him is a comical highlight, and he continues to steal the screen whenever he pipes up, usually with a cheerful assertion of some sort. I would speculate that of the seven, Pegg had the most fun; the Scottish engineer seems positively giddy throughout most of his all-too-brief appearances. I also like his interaction with one of the movie's few non-humanoid aliens. Few fans would argue with the statement that in the battle of Star Trek versus Star Wars, the latter has the coolest aliens. Abrams and his team seem determined to amend that, or at least remain open to the idea of a more diverse Federation. My favorite example of this is the disgruntled creature who finds himself lodged between Kirk and Uhura in the disastrous bar scene reminiscent of Top Gun in which he meets and puts the moves on her.

Giacchino's stirring score blends neatly with the action most of the time, with some of the more emotional moments containing hints of music we've heard on LOST. The special effects are impeccable, aside from a few moments that seem to be overdoing it just a little. I'm not too used to Jedi-style sword fights and escape from enormous hostile creatures on this series. Those new to the franchise at least aren't likely to complain that the movie lacks action. The movie offers something to love for viewers at any point along the previous Star Trek experience spectrum; as for me, I'm already looking forward to the sequel.