Back when it was on the air, I used to watch The Golden Girls,
mostly because I loved sweet, naïve, animal-loving Rose, portrayed by
Betty White. I’ve seen her pop up in all sorts of other places since
then and shared in the amusement of many mall visitors when the calendar
kiosk where I worked last year stocked dozens of calendars bearing her
image. It seems she is quite the star. So when my friend lent me her
latest book, If You Ask Me (And of Course You Won’t), I was interested to see what she had to say for herself.
Practically
her first assertion is “Writing is my favorite thing.” This particular
admission is actually written in longhand, which she integrates into
later portions of her book as well. It’s funny to think of a beloved
actress claiming such a quiet pursuit as an even deeper passion, but
it’s nice to know that she enjoyed herself while penning this memoir.
The book is a pretty quick read at about 250 pages, which are grouped
into eight sections of loosely related reflections. With 46 chapters,
none of them is more than a few pages long. The most extensive chapter
is the one dealing with her 2010 appearance on Saturday Night Live, and even that is not quite ten pages long and includes several photos.
Of
course, every chapter has at least one accompanying photo, and there’s a
blank page following each chapter, plus a separate page for section
headings, so what you’re really getting are fewer than 150 pages of
actual text. The tone is very conversational; you feel like you are just
sitting down for an afternoon with Betty and she is relating some of
the stories of her life as they come to her. I haven’t read any of her
other books, so I can’t say whether this is the way they all are, but it
works pretty well. It just feels a bit like we’re only scratching the
surface because she’s barely begun to discuss a topic before she’s moved
on to the next one.
The timeliest section is the one that prompted the writing of this book. Hollywood Stories discusses Hot in Cleveland, The Proposal, The Lost Valentine and the immensely popular Snickers Super Bowl commercial that prompted the Facebook campaign that led to her co-hosting of Saturday Night Live.
Through all her successes, she maintains a humble attitude, repeatedly
saying what a joy it is to be able to do something she loves for a
living and to make enough money at it to feed her other passions. She
never seems to forget that hers is a life that many would love to have.
She reveals nothing shocking in her recollections. This memoir is as courteous as Donny Osmond’s,
and she spends no time spewing venom on anyone. She seems to go out of
her way to see the good in people. For instance, in one chapter, she
discusses film projects she declined because they contained scenes she
found distasteful. However, she also indicates that the writers who
penned the offending screenplays are very talented. She comes across as a
woman of both integrity and tact.
Perhaps the most interesting
revelation for me was that she never wanted to go into show business as a
child. Instead, it was always her dream to become a park ranger or a
zookeeper. This love of animals permeates the book at all turns, whether
she is recalling memorable encounters with creatures like Koko the
gorilla and Beethoven the beluga, discussing the idiosyncrasies of her
beloved pets or confiding the comfort she has derived on set from fans
who bring their dogs to meet her. While she has glowing remarks to make
about many colleagues and friends, not to mention her adored late
husband, she admits that she has always felt more comfortable in the
presence of furry companions.
This is a very lightweight book,
but it really is a delight to read. From her self-effacing comments
about her struggles with stage fright and connecting faces with names to
her fond memories of her parents and her easy-going attitude about
approaching 90, If You Ask Me is relentlessly cheerful, almost
inevitably provoking a sense of uplift. Betty White is an American icon
and a very considerate woman, and if you ask me, her words are well
worth reading.
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