Friday, November 6, 2009

Buy Yourself a Bloody Ben Linus and Watch the Baddie Bobble

This past summer marked the last LOST panel at the San Diego Comic-Con, if head writers Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse are to be believed. I wanted to go. But I couldn’t afford such an extravagant trip, especially when I wasn’t even sure I’d be able to get into the LOST panel. So I followed the coverage from afar. But shortly before the convention began, I got wind of an exclusive convention item that I longed to possess. I’m not one who does a lot of frivolous spending, but figurines are one of my downfalls, and LOST has been steadily depleting my bank account ever since I discovered McFarlane’s sadly truncated line of talking action figures. The object of my desire this time? A bloody Ben Linus bobblehead.

No, I’m not swearing a la raving Scotsman Desmond. I’m describing the physical condition of the character at the moment in which he is captured. On the one hand, I thought, “Now why in the world do we want to look at that?” On the other hand, there’s a certain satisfaction for some in seeing Ben beaten to a bloody pulp. Not that it’s really anything new; Ben has probably endured as much bodily injury as any character on the show. And he’s usually had it coming.

But even though he’s a homicidal sociopath, Ben is one of LOST‘s most compelling characters, and I can’t help being completely fascinated with him and hoping he will find redemption. In that light, this is actually an ideal way for Ben to be presented, since it shows the immediate aftermath of one of his more sympathetic moments. We don’t know that at the time when we first see him board Ajira 316, his left arm cradled in a sling over his pale purple shirt, luggage and jacket draped over his right arm. We also don’t know that before his moment of mercy, he had murder on his mind, though anybody who had seen season four’s The Shape of Things to Come probably could venture a guess about the promise he told Jack he had to keep before he left Los Angeles. This is a moment that reminds the ardent fan of the best and worst in Ben, that accentuates his inscrutability. We probably won’t really know where he’s coming from until the final episode. If then.

Of course, since I was not going to Comic-Con, I was in a jam, as this bobblehead kept taunting me in Facebook links and in the pages of TV Guide. My understanding was that he would be for sale at Comic-Con, in an extremely limited run, and would never be seen again. And I found that most unfair. So after the convention began, I trotted off to eBay, and I secured myself a Ben Linus, even as I berated myself for paying such an inflated price for such a silly trinket. And then, this week, after getting word that more LOST bobbleheads are being rolled out, I found out that Ben is now available at the website Entertainment Earth for a mere $17. If I’d known that was going to happen, I would have waited and saved myself some money.

But aside from my disgruntlement over spending more than I had to, I don’t regret buying Ben. He comes in a white package stamped with the Dharma logo, and I thought about keeping him there, ironically trapped inside a “magic box”. But I couldn’t resist taking him out and thunking him down on my piano. Ben is seven inches tall and pretty heavy-duty. He stands on a black base with the Dharma logo on top in white and “Benjamin Linus” across the front and “LOST” on the back, also in white.

His shoes are brown, his pants are black, his pinstriped lilac shirt is disarmingly dapper. Though his arm is in a sling, it’s his face that really shows the aftermath of his ordeal, with large red streaks across his forehead, cheeks and chin. There are five scars in all, the most glaring one a gaping wound on his left cheek that extends to his eye and the bridge of his nose. His eyes are blue and beady, while his lips are pursed into a disquieting expression that may be indicative of misery or mirth; you never can tell with Ben. His hair is brown and rather messy; his ears have avoided serious injury. The skin tone is natural, with a very slight greyish tint to fit the experience Ben has just had, and his head is well situated, bobbling boisterously with the flick of a finger.

Of course, I’ve been spoiled by both the McFarlane figures and the bobblehead Spock I bought in May; those come equipped with sound chips, and I’d love to have a more complete representation of Michael Emerson’s Emmy-winning magnificence. For this bobblehead, the most logical quote would probably be, “If you can ever get off this Island, find Desmond Hume for me. Tell him I said I was sorry.” Alas, the one line I really long for in a talking Ben figure, “You guys got any milk?”, is so far in the past that he wasn’t even going by the same name at the time. Anyway, it’s a moot point since this Ben doesn’t speak. Oh, how I wish he did! Only if this figure was anything like my Spock bobblehead, he would start randomly jabbering in the middle of the night. Spock is generally soothing; Ben might give me the heebie-jeebies if he caught me by surprise at three in the morning.

If you’re as big a LOST geek as I am, then I feel obliged to inform you that Bif Bang Pow! didn’t stop with Ben. You can get 7-inch-tall action figures Jack and Kate or Sawyer and Juliet, dressed in Dharma garb and costing $30 per pair. These are fun, but since I already have McFarlane versions of all but Juliet, I can probably resist them. Same goes for Edgar Halliwax, one of the several personas of Dr. Pierre Chang, because when he’s staring out from that filmstrip, that dude is just creepy, even if he is holding a bunny.

Though I feel my resolve wavering even now, so I’ll move on to Richard Alpert, the serene Others advisor who became so much more interesting when season three‘s The Man Behind the Curtain revealed his agelessness. And unlike the other bobbleheads in this line, at least so far, he comes on a sand-colored base covered with leaves and twigs, and the top of it reads “Ille qui nos omnes servabit,” which is the elusive answer to the all-important question, “What lies in the shadow of the statue?”

Even better is Daniel Faraday, addled scientist extraordinaire, portrayed so winningly by Jeremy Davies. He’s got a lousy memory and a heap of mother issues (which is a bit of a nice change, I guess, from all the father issues, though he probably has those too). But he’s the only one who has any kind of handle on what is happening to the Island in the science fiction-heavy fifth season, so this gentle quantum physicist is not only one of my favorite characters, he’s indispensable. “Edgar,” Richard and Daniel each go for $13; I’m not sure why they’re four bucks cheaper than Ben, but I’m not complaining. The only downside is that they don’t arrive until early 2010, though you can pre-order them now. And, of course, that they don’t have sound chips either.

LOST‘s time is up in just a few short months. But maybe Bif Bang Pow! can help extend the experience just a little. I don’t know how many more bobbleheads are planned, so I don’t know that I’m prepared to say yet which one is the best of the bunch, and anyway, we all have our favorites. But Ben is certainly one of the most iconic characters, so if you’re an avid collector, I suspect the bedraggled Mr. Linus will be hard to pass up.

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