Skyline Caverns a Cool Retreat from Summer Sun

For several years, my aunt Joyce has had a cozy cabin in Virginia. She doesn’t use it extremely often because she already has an extremely cozy house. But it’s a nice retreat, and we went there once before when we visited. During one of the days that we stayed there, we made the trip to Skyline Caverns in Front Royal, and the main thing I remember about that excursion is that I got fearfully carsick. I was crossing my fingers that such an unpleasantness wouldn’t occur when we made the same trip last month, this time with our exchange student Cathi in tow. Luckily, my stomach was more cooperative on this occasion, and we got to our destination with little trouble. The drive didn't seem so long as it had the first time. When we reached the caverns, it starting raining. It was a quick downpour, and we were able to wait it out in the car before going in.

There was a tour just starting, and we managed to catch that one. It was led by a guy who couldn't have been much older than my 16-year-old brother Nathan and who strongly resembled Harry Potter. I remembered some of the formations from before, but I did not recall how cheesy the verbal portion of the tour was. It was very much a canned tour, the sort of thing I used to do when I narrated the train rides for ZooBoo in Erie. I was all too familiar with the pun-peppered speech that made the audience groan. At least I didn't notice anybody telling him he ought to write new material. I got that after every single tour, as if I wrote the script! Besides, it's supposed to be goofy.

Anyway, our group seemed to be pretty good sports, but there was one point, in the part of the caves that they call the Cathedral, when we were subjected to a "light show" that amounted to a dramatic voice from above preaching Christian and environmentalist doctrine. I was just glad to see the two on the same page; I'm sick of them being considered mutually exclusive by many people. But I won't argue that it was over the top. Cathi was mildly offended that it was a part of the tour at all. "That's so mean!" she protested later, her typical phrase of disapproval. She didn't think they had any business putting something like that in a public tour that people were paying for and thought a lot of people might get offended. Of course, this was the Bible belt, and it was a nature sanctuary of sorts, so both of the announcer’s points of view made sense. But perhaps it was a bit much.

Cathi also disliked the fact that they had names for all the formations, leaving no room to our imaginations. I definitely get what she's saying; on the other hand, it would probably be a lot harder to conduct the tour if there weren't any landmarks with specific names. I especially liked the Three Wise Men and the nearby Bethlehem; the lucky rock that thousands of people had rubbed over the years, wearing it down to an incredibly smooth texture; the shallow pool that was home to trout; and the anthodites, spiky formations on the cave ceiling near the end of the tour that have been found in no other caves in the world. In spite of the corny touches, the tour was still a fun thing to do, and the caverns were nice and cool, a relief from the hot day. I bought some postcards in the gift shop, which was a basically a general store of the sort you might find in any small rural location. There’s a very similar one in Little Pine Valley, where my family goes camping every year. When we went outside I admired the miniature train that we could have bought tickets to ride in. It was mainly intended for little kids, I think, but there were some adults on board so it could have been an option. Next to the train was a large dinosaur statue, and I think there was also a small miniature golf course.

The tour itself lasted about an hour, and with $2 off coupons it cost $12 each. Dad got several nice pictures inside the caverns, and it was yet another new experience Cathi could say she had in America. If you happen to be in the area, I would recommend it as an afternoon diversion, which could be combined with a few hours at nearby Shenandoah National Park. Another nice trip of that nature is to Penn’s Cave, in which the tour is conducted on a boat. Due to adverse weather conditions, we were unable to complete the extent of the tour, so I would like to go back sometime on a sunny day. Anyway, for those interested in geology or just looking for a unique experience, Skyline Caverns is worth a look.