Get LOST With Paul Simon in This SNL Christmas Collection

The tree is down, and so are the outside lights and most of the inside decorations. Holiday compilations are out of the rotation in the CD player. I almost have Christmas out of my system. Before I let it go, I have to allow myself a few more Christmas movies from my Netflix queue. Last week, I treated myself to Saturday Night Live: Christmas Past.

Released in 1999, it contains mostly sketches from the variety show's glory days, with the likes of Dan Aykroyd and Chevy Chase, and later Dana Carvey and Chris Farley. The most recent material includes Molly Shannon and Cheri Oteri. The special clocks in at just over an hour; while it includes 18 amusing skits, I'm sure SNL could easily release another volume, particularly with the inclusion of sketches from the last decade. I'd put in a vote for the obnoxious couple at the Christmas tree lot (2005) and, dare I confess, 2006's phenomenally popular music video starring Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake. What this collection gives us is a range of material, most of it slightly off-color.

Christmas Eve At The White House - Chevy Chase does his usual Gerald-Ford-is-a-klutz shtick, and it's pretty funny, though extremely ridiculous. In Chase's hands, the poor president can't do anything right; he is unable to follow simple instructions for how to give his Christmas address; he hangs his children's stockings upside-down; he knocks over the Christmas tree. Pure slapstick, and bearing very little resemblance, I'm sure, to the real guy.

Opening Montage - Bill Murray does an opening monologue, and when Santa (Dan Aykroyd) shows up, he has all sorts of great stuff to say about him. Nothing objectionable about this one, but it seemed very short.

Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood on Christmas - I'm not sure I want this guy as my neighbor. Eddie Murphy spoofs Mr. Rogers in a ghetto version of the beloved man in the sweater. Actually, he's everything Mr. Rogers isn't, as he demonstrates when, clad in a Santa suit, he opens his sack of stolen toys and confides his plan to make a killing by ringing a bell and holding out a Salvation Army kettle. Murphy is a funny guy, but I'm not sure this one sits so well with me...

Delicious Dish - The two most boring women on the planet (played by Molly Shannon and Ana Gasteyer) host a holiday edition of their NPR cooking show. Their special guest is a baker (Alec Baldwin) with the last name Schwetty whose specialty is "balls". You know, like Russian tea cakes and doughnut holes. It's ever so benign, but the three take the opportunity to cram as much innuendo into one sketch as they possibly can. I think I saw this one live; certainly it's shown up in a bunch of SNL clip shows. It's Austin Powers-style naughty.

Church Chat - Dana Carvey is the persnickety "Church Lady" who invites guests onto her show just to scold them. Pretty funny, especially since I definitely know a few people like that. After two guests, one of them Danny Devito as himself, get a stern tongue-lashing, the Church Lady rocks out on the drums, and Devito does some festive singing.

Martha Stewart's Topless Christmas Special - This bizarre segment features Ana Gasteyer as Martha Stewart, cheerfully instructing anyone who cares to listen on the finer points of merrymaking, such as making a ludicrously complicated table decoration, though of course she claims that it's simple. For the most part, though, the humor derives from the fact that she is conducting her entire show topless (with a strategically placed black bar, of course). Um... why?

Hannukah Song - Ah, finally we're getting to the really good stuff. My second-favorite segment on the DVD, this has Norm McDonald at the news desk introducing Adam Sandler, who strums his guitar and sings a career-making song about all the famous people who are Jewish, so as to help Jewish kids to feel a little less left out around Christmastime. Funny, informative, even somewhat touching, this one is a winner, and I always turn up the volume when it comes on the radio in December.

A Holiday Wish - Steve Martin sits in a cozy easy chair and expounds upon what he would ask for if he had just one wish for Christmas. It starts out very warm and fuzzy but quickly degenerates as he adds more and more wishes, each less sentimental than the last. With a bit of a 12 Days of Christmas feel to it - though, thankfully, he stops long before 12 - this is dryly amusing but also considerably crass.

Matt Foley: Motivational Speaker - Phil Hartman hires Matt Foley (Chris Farley) to be the Santa in his shopping mall. I've been subjected to many skits in this series, and all of them give me a headache. Farley's vocal delivery makes me want to hit "mute" after a few seconds. My brother Nathan thought this one, which featured Sally Field as a furious mom and a slew of kids - an unusual sight on SNL - was hilarious, but I wasn't too impressed, aside from the rather clever way he managed to work his "van down by the river" shtick into a Visit From St. Nicholas-style Christmas story.

Consumer Probe - This one, however, had me laughing quite a bit. Candace Bergen grills a slimy toymaker played by Dan Aykroyd about the dangerous toys his company continues to make, while he tries to point out their value and convince her that even the most innocent of toys could potentially result in injury. Very funny.

Lost Ending of It's A Wonderful Life - It's William Shatner! But not for long. He merely introduces this missing ending of the Frank Capra classic. While the cast members do a pretty good job of imitating the various characters from that movie, it kinda takes the warm fuzzies out of it when George (Dana Carvey) leads the rest of the townsfolk in an angry mob against that nasty old man who stole his money.

Santa Wrap - This looks like something that could have been on American Inventor. Dan Aykroyd explains the advantage of Santa wrap, which he applies to the most unsanitary lap of a grossly inebriated mall Santa (John Belushi). A rather entertaining little commercial.

The Nigh Hannukah Harry Saved Christmas - Jon Lovitz as Hanukah Harry fills in for Santa, who is sick. A jovial fellow, he is nonetheless received with some disappointment by a pair of eagerly waiting kids when he gives them rather dull Jewish-themed gifts instead of the toys they were expecting. But it ends on a fairly heartwarming note when Santa comes anyway and the kids decide that Harry, too, is worthy of appreciation.

Deserted Island Christmas - I would have been very disappointed if this hadn't been included. In fact, it was the main reason I rented the DVD. I saw this on a television Christmas special once, and I absolutely adored it. Paul Simon? Desert island? Talk about a winning combination! He and Victoria Jackson are a couple stranded for Christmas, but they don't care too much. They're going to make a celebration of it anyway, and Paul feels rather pleased with himself over the potholders he's made and the fancy shells he's found as gifts for his ladylove... until she reveals an exquisite handmade watch and telescope and details how she managed to create them. Sweet and hilarious.

Winter Wonderland - Fun group song. Everybody gets involved, and as the ladies and gentlemen battle it out with their harmonies, it grows more and more chaotic.

Dysfunctional Family Christmas - More musical merriment, though it offers an awfully bleak view of the holidays. Phil Hartman and the gang advertise a collection of songs celebrating the darker side of Christmas.

Rita From Brooklyn - Outrageous New York accents rule the day as Cheri Oteri, Rosie O'Donnell and Penny Marshall duke it out over their lawn decorations until a group of caroling children change their perspective. Pretty funny.

Master Thespian - Almost a rehash of Matt Foley, with Jon Lovitz in the Santa suit instead this time. Phil Hartman is the mall manager again, and once more he finds he's got a little more than he bargained for with this overdramatic St. Nick. I like it better than the Chris Farley one, but it might have been nice to end the disc on something a little less repetitive.

All told, it's a moderately entertaining collection, but the crude nature of most of the sketches makes it a DVD I wouldn't go out of my way to include in the yearly holiday rotation. If you've ever gotten a laugh out of SNL, though, give it a shot. For my money, it's worth a look just for Deserted Island Christmas. Now if they only could have gotten Paulie to sing the Gilligan's Island theme song...