The Bakers and the Murtaughs Square Off in Cheaper By the Dozen 2

I recently watched the Steve Martin remake of Cheaper By the Dozen, and while I found it predictably corny and slapstick-heavy, I also thought it was a fun and occasionally touching movie. When I realized that there was a sequel, I quickly stuck that in the queue, and it, too, is a silly but rather heartwarming family comedy that made for enjoyable viewing.

Tom Baker (Martin) and his wife Kate (Bonnie Hunt) have an expansive family that includes a dozen children. This movie takes place a couple years after the first, so the kids look pretty much the same, and I found it pretty easy to keep them straight this time around. I’m sure that was partly because I had another movie in which to get used to them, but even if you haven’t seen the first movie, I think this one introduces everyone fairly well, and it works as a stand-alone. In fact, considering that one of the main gags – my least favorite part of both movies – is recycled from the first, you might almost enjoy it more without having seen the original.

In this sequel, directed by Adam Shankman, Tom is feeling a bit weepy because his daughter Lorraine (Hilary Duff) has just graduated from high school and is moving to New York, and his oldest daughter, a now married and very pregnant Nora (Piper Perabo), is moving to Texas in the fall. One advantage of having seen the first movie here is that we can see how much better her husband Bud (Jonathan Bennett) is for her than her dopey boyfriend in that movie. Bud is both kind and accomplished, and he understands Nora’s need to feel connected to her family. It doesn’t take much to get him to agree to join in the family vacation Tom proposes.

In years past, the Bakers made a habit of visiting Lake Winnetka, Wisconsin, and for nostalgia’s sake, this is where they return. Unfortunately, their cabin has fallen into a state of disrepair and is still occupied by a kleptomaniac rat. Meanwhile, Tom’s lifelong nemesis Jimmy Murtaugh (Eugene Levy) has an expansive, state-of-the-art summer home nearby, and it isn’t long before their old rivalry heats up and the rest of the two families get dragged down with them. The Murtaugh clan includes Jimmy’s much younger and more easy-going fourth wife Sarina (Carmen Electra) and eight children, all of whom seem to be extremely accomplished and disciplined.

Jimmy runs a tight ship and rubs it in that Tom’s crew is so chaotic, and before long, the Murtaughs and Bakers are locked into competition for a trophy that only the dads care about. The kids and wives get along fine, but the antagonism of the fathers toward each other puts a damper on everyone else’s fun. I’ve seen Martin and Levy together before in Bringing Down the House, and they have great comic chemistry whether they’re playing best buddies or squabbling neighbors. Tom swings between goofy and sentimental and militant and over-involved; some of the time I sympathized with him, and other times I wanted to throttle him. Even at his most irritating, though, I can’t help finding Martin pretty lovable. Levy’s Jimmy is dull and haughty, and it’s easy to see why he annoys Tom so much. I always enjoy Levy’s bland, deadpan comedic style, and it works well here. Meanwhile, Hunt and Electra work well together in less exaggerated roles.

We don’t really get to know the individual Murtaughs too well, with two exceptions, and both are because of how they relate to the Bakers. Anne (Jaime King), the oldest of the Murtaughs and the apple of her father’s eye, is struggling to summon the courage to tell him she doesn’t want to go into the family business. Meanwhile, she’s caught the attention of Tom Welling’s Charlie, who is off on his own now but working in the city to stay close to his family despite being a country boy at heart. Charlie is a lot less angsty this time around, and I liked his storyline. The male standout among the Murtaugh kids is a young Taylor Lautner as Eliot, a sunny lad who steals the heart of tomboy Sarah (Alyson Stoner) in a sweet puppy love storyline that prompts some pretty abhorrent behavior from both dads, especially Tom. While I still love Mark (Forrest Landis), the four-eyed frog lover with my favorite storyline in the first movie, he takes a major backseat here, and Sarah becomes the most interesting of the Bakers to me this time around as she navigates the joys and humiliations of first love.

As before, slapstick abounds, and sometimes that means massive disaster. The Bakers are responsible for two incidents that cause thousands of dollars in damage, and I couldn’t bring myself to find either of those scenes nearly as funny as they were intended to be, though I did wonder whether an incident involving fireworks may have been inspired by a scene early in Peter Jackson’s version of Fellowship of the Ring. Aside from the rampant destruction in a few scenes, I didn’t mind the chaos much, and I thought this holiday at the lake seemed like a pretty idyllic vacation, warring patriarchs aside. The comedy is pretty predictable stuff, but it nonetheless kept my parents and me laughing. If you’re looking for a light-hearted, summery flick for the family, I’d say Cheaper By the Dozen 2 fits the bill.

A Boatload of Bakers Means Bushels of Baloney in Cheaper By the Dozen

Remakes seem to be rampant in theaters lately. One of the many to hit the big screen in the past decade was Cheaper By the Dozen, a remake of a 1950 classic that I never saw. As a fan of Steve Martin and Smallville’s Tom Welling, I’d wanted to check it out for a while, despite the high probability of cheesiness. I can’t make comparisons with the original, but now that I finally got around to seeing it, I liked it better than I expected. Is it corny? Yes. But I also found it funny and touching.

Tom Baker (Martin) is a small-time coach with a great big dream: to coach college football at his alma mater in Chicago. His wife Kate (Bonnie Hunt) has pretty big dreams too: writing and publishing a book. Both of these dreams have a shot at becoming a reality at once, which might be cause for excitement alone in an ordinary family. But this is no ordinary family. No, the Baker brood includes 12 children, 11 of whom still live at home. With Mom headed off to New York City to kick off a major book tour and Dad gearing up for what he hopes will be a winning season, who is going to keep an eye on a house full of rambunctious kids resentful that they had to leave their farmhouse home for life in the big city?

The movie does a decent job differentiating the characters, though some of them still blend together for me. In many cases, it doesn’t much matter who’s who; we just have rapid-fire chaos, some of which is funny, some of which is just cringe-inducing as one disaster follows another. Of the 12, about half are more a part of the collective than really interesting stand-alone characters. These include twins Nigel and Kyle (Brent and Shane Kinsman), the energetic youngest of the clan; Mike (Blake Woodruff), their slightly older brother; twins Kim and Jessica (Morgan York and Liliana Mumy); and their brother Jake (Jacob Smith). Generally, they just add to the cacophony of the household without standing out too much as individuals.

The rest are more well-defined. Nora (Piper Perabo), the oldest at 22, lives in Chicago with her boyfriend, a dopey, egotistical aspiring actor played by Ashton Kutcher in typical obnoxious mode. While I started out feeling sorry for him, especially after the kids play a prank on him that is both crude and dangerous, it wasn’t long before I found him as unlikable as the rest of the Bakers do. Nora herself is fairly sweet but torn between loyalty to her family and devotion to her boyfriend. I was a little disappointed not to connect much to Welling’s character, angsty senior Charlie, who spends most of his time being sulky and sarcastic, though I did feel for him as he bemoaned the fact that he and his girlfriend would now be hours away from each other.

Hillary Duff starts out in full-on bratty teenager mode as Lorraine, a fashion-conscious high schooler, but she gradually becomes more likable as she sticks up for her siblings in trying situations. Henry (Kevin G. Schmidt) is a rough-and-tumble bully type, while devious Sarah (Alyson Stoner) is smart-mouthed and always has some sort of devilish plan up her sleeve. Kate seems to have everything pretty well organized so that the kids mostly stay out of each other’s way and disasters are kept to a minimum, but Tom can’t quite hack it. I love watching Martin in goofball dad mode, though as his stress increases over the course of the movie, his parenting skills suffer greatly.

My favorite Baker is Mark (Forrest Landis), a delicate, bespectacled child who is accident-prone and lonely. Subjected to a humiliating nickname that alludes to what an oddball he is within his own family, he seeks solace in his pet toad and the gorgeous tower room he manages to snag for himself in their Victorian mansion. Of the several sub-plots running throughout the movie, I found Mark’s the most compelling as he battles his insecurities and isolation and tries to figure out just how he fits in, and I was gratified to see that his journey is ultimately what brings together several of those loose threads and takes us to the movie’s most moving moment.

Yes, some of the kids’ hijinks get a little old. I’ve never been a big fan of destroy-the-house-style comedy, and we definitely get a fair bit of that here. The running gag with a falling chandelier is pretty tired by the time it’s run its course, though I suppose there is something inherently amusing about watching Wayne Knight fall off a ladder. The Bakers’ new neighbor Tina (Paula Marshall) is pretty hard to take with her shrill over-protectiveness, though I found her easy-going husband (Alan Ruck) and son Dylan (Steven Anthony Lawrence), who is extremely sheltered and longs for some excitement, pretty likable. The movie is heavy on the slapstick and the sap, but I didn’t mind the latter and the former wasn’t enough to turn me off of the movie. On the whole, I enjoyed this chronicle of one big sometimes-happy family trying to have it all. In fact, the sequel is already in my queue.

Smallville's Shortened Seventh Season Piles on the Fun With Kryptonian Kara

Back in 2006, my brother Nathan, then a senior in high school, got me hooked on Smallville on DVD. In the months leading up to his departure for college, we watched the first three seasons. Over the course of his freshman year we watched two more. But since then it's been slow going in getting caught up, so that we only just now finished season seven and are faced with the fact that we're probably never going to actually catch up with this show, since if past seasons are any indication, season eight will hit DVD about a week before season nine premieres. Well, maybe we'll try to cram it all into one week. Or maybe we'll just resign ourselves to watching Smallville exclusively on DVD. Frankly, I'm pretty surprised at the show's longevity, simply because it's a prequel, and Clark's seemed on the verge of donning those tights for about three seasons now. But I'm not complaining, and if I still have Smallville to look forward to after LOST concludes, so much the better.

Season seven of Smallville is, in some ways, lighter than the sixth, in which Clark must deal with the aftermath of a staggering personal loss and the impending nuptials of the girl of his dreams to his best-friend-turned-arch-nemesis, all while trying to round up a series of bloodthirsty intergalactic convicts who make the meteor freaks look like minor irritations. It isn't that the stakes aren't high in the seventh season, but the sense of peril is less pervasive, and there's even a fair amount of domestic tranquility for Clark, who really seems like an adult for the first time (though Tom Welling looks exactly the same as he did when Clark was supposed to be a freshman in high school). Though he's still a farm boy, he's now running the place, with his mom Martha (Annette O'Toole) out of the picture in Washington, D.C. Moreover, he's spending more and more time in Metropolis, where intrepid reporter Chloe Sullivan (Allison Mack) and dorky heart-of-gold photographer Jimmy Olsen (Aaron Ashmore) work for The Daily Planet, soon to be joined by budding journalist Lois Lane (Erica Durance). Can it be long before Clark joins their ranks? For the second season in a row, an alternate reality sequence has him donning the iconic thick-framed glasses and suit. Now if only phone booths weren't so hard to come by nowadays...

Though political advancement removes Martha from the equation, Lex's (Michael Rosenbaum) father Lionel (John Glover) still has a significant role to play in Clark's life. It's curious to see him playing the protective, paternal role, especially since Martha is no longer there to act as a link between these two powerful men. While Lionel often acts in ways that seem suspect, he claims to be on Clark's side, and despite years of experience with Lionel's villainy, Clark generally seems to believe that this tycoon has turned over a new leaf. Lionel has been one of the show's most compelling characters for me, in large part because of Glover's brilliant performance; his theatrical background and his masterful way of masking his character's motivations remind me very much of LOST's Michael Emerson. And like Ben, the bug-eyed baddie Emerson portrays, Lionel is a character I've been longing to see redeemed in the end. Since I don't see how that can happen with Lex, I've transferred my hopes onto Lionel. It takes a while for him to become a part of the season, but once he does, his participation is crucial.

We've also got Lana (Kristin Kreuk), who just won't go away no matter how many times it seems like she may be off the show for good. Since I never hopped aboard the Clark and Lana ship, and since I know he's going to end up with Lois anyway, I'm not sure I appreciated Clark and Lana's cohabitation in this season as much as I could have. I mean, poor Clark has wanted this for years, and now he finally has a shot at domestic bliss with his one true love, a woman who now knows most of his deep dark secrets. But her tenure as a Luthor girl did nothing to improve the toxic aspects of her personality; despite the sweet exterior, some of her actions this season are downright diabolical, and it isn't long before distrust and deceit starts to settle in at the Kent Farm.

Though he stoops to some very dark deeds this season, at times, Lex still manages to come across as a decent human being, particularly in his associations with the newest member of the principal cast, a blonde beauty named Kara (Laura Vandervoort) who happens to be Clark's biological cousin. Yes, it just so happens that Kal-El was not the only Kryptonian to escape to Earth, but Kara was stuck in suspended animation for a couple decades longer. Her first act upon awakening in this strange new world involves rescuing Lex from a watery death in a precise parallel of what Clark did in the show's very first episode. Lex sees her first as an angel of mercy, later as the key to solving the mystery that has plagued him for so many years. Kara carries herself with an air of innocence and youthful rebellion. Though she remembers the infant Kal-El, Clark is now older than her, and since she's on his home turf, he has to show her the ropes. Unlike Clark, she doesn't feel the desire to keep her powers secret; convincing her to lay low is one of his most trying tasks throughout the season. Meanwhile, he struggles with revelations about an old family feud that cast Kara in a questionable light and suffers the indignity of knowing this newcomer might be a novice in the ways of Earth but is fully equipped to take to the skies. On the whole, I found Kara a refreshing addition, injecting an extra dose of youthful fun into the season and allowing Clark a different sort of significant relationship in his life while opening a window to a deeper understanding of his biological mother.

Because I've always loved Jimmy Olsen and because Ashmore captures the character's sweetness and goofiness perfectly, Smallville has finally sold me on a Chloe romantic relationship with someone other than Clark that I can root for, particularly since Chloe's status as Clark's most cherished and indispensable friend is assured at this point. Chloe and Jimmy share some of the most tender moments of the season, as well as some of the funniest. Granted, their courtship has its ups and downs, particularly since Chloe is afraid to reveal to him that she has been endowed with a miraculous gift with potentially fatal side effects, and Kara's immediate (and rather inexplicable) infatuation with him complicates matters somewhat. But I'd much rather watch these two characters I genuinely love and can sympathize with equally work together through the trials that come their way than cringe over the twisted couplings that surround them. I'm starting to think theirs may turn out to be Smallville's grandest love story. It's fun to throw Lois into the mix too, especially when she and Jimmy end up working together, since their personalities contrast so magnificently. While romantic sparks never fly between them, it's sweet to watch them develop a deeper sense of respect and affection for one another. Meanwhile, Lois's luck in love seems to change this season when the hunky new boss Grant Gabriel (Michael Cassidy) takes a liking to her.

Some old faces resurface this season, including the silky artificial intelligence known as Milton Fine (James Marsters); filthy rich, gadget-heavy vigilante Oliver Queen (Justin Hartley), who secures a surprising assistant in his quest to rid the world of injustice; and, much to my excitement, the long-neglected Pete Ross (Sam Jones III), who vanished without a trace back in the third season. Don't get too excited; he's not in it for the long haul. But just getting a brief visit with this terrific character, the Ron Weasley of Smallville, is a true gift to long-time fans of the series. Other significant characters, such as Jonathan Kent and Dr. Virgil Swann, are referenced but not seen, while one sinister character maddeningly assumes Clark's identity, which naturally leads to complications, mostly with his relationship to Lana. Of course, every season includes at least one instance of Clark being "not himself," either because he's under the influence of some nefarious substance or because someone else has assumed his form, but this is one of the more effective uses of that device. On a related note, two otherwise ordinary people in Clark's life suddenly develop unusual abilities, which leads to comical situations but ultimately causes insecurity all around.

Most of the season's best episodes shine a light on past events. Lara and Blue both help Kal-El's mother to emerge from the shadows of memory as a vibrant, loving woman, while Fracture offers a fascinating peek into Lex's labyrinthian mind, giving us a compelling reason to consider him redeemable despite all evidence to the contrary. This little-seen side of Lex emerges again in the chilling Descent. I also enjoyed the It's a Wonderful Life-like Apocalypse, in which Clark has a chance to see what the world would be like if he'd never made it to Earth. Throughout the season, surprising connections among characters come to light, and the trustworthiness of various characters remains unclear. It's a season that keeps us guessing, and having a whole lot of fun along the way. It's a shame that, due to the writers' strike, there are fewer episodes than usual, but even so, season seven is top-notch.

A More Adult Clark Makes New Friends and Enemies in Smallville's Sixth Season

Three years ago, my brother Nathan got me hooked on Smallville, the CW show that re-imagines the adolescence and young adulthood of all-American superhero Clark Kent. Within one year, we'd watched the first five seasons, but we only just finished season six now, which leaves us two seasons behind and despairing of ever catching up before the series concludes. Whether or not we manage it, we'll certainly be sticking it out to the end on DVD.

Every season of Smallville finds Clark and company with different preoccupations. This time around, Clark (Tom Welling) has a doozy of a problem on his hands when he accidentally releases several of the most heinous criminals in the universe from the Phantom Zone where he was trapped by Zod, the evil entity whose possession of Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum) set up the season five cliff-hanger. Rounding up the rogue Zoners becomes his top priority, though he also has his eye on Lex, who is secretly experimenting on meteor freaks while getting uncomfortably cozy with Lana Lang (Kristin Kreuk), who, much as he hates to admit it, is still the girl of Clark's dreams.

For the most part, Lex's devotion to Lana seems to be the only thing keeping him from fully succumbing to his devilish destiny, though there are still flickers of decency that come across elsewhere, particularly in a powerful late-season moment with Clark. Their interaction is limited, however, and generally bristling with animosity. It's clear that Lex hasn't far to go to become Clark's nemesis, just one indication that the series must be nearing its end. I get the sense that if Lana had embraced Lex's advances a season or two earlier, it might have been enough to curtail his villainy; by this point, he's just in too deep.

Another indication that the series is moving into its endgame is the relocation of much of the action to Metropolis and the addition of both the Justice League and bumbling photographer Jimmy Olsen (Aaron Ashmore). As a long-time fan of Jimmy, I was tickled to see him join the cast of characters, though I had mixed feelings about the manner in which he was introduced as an old flame of Chloe Sullivan (Allison Mack), since he turned up just when it was beginning to look like Clark might actually return Chloe's long-unrequited affections. Since we know that Clark has to end up with Lois Lane (Erica Durance), though, I guess there's not much point in throwing him and Chloe together now and risking the strength of their friendship. In that light, adorable Jimmy is most welcome as a sincere suitor and a consistent source of comic relief.

The season drops occasional hints at the future Lois and Clark romance, especially in Crimson, the Valentine's Day episode in which Lois applies some aphrodisiac lipstick with disastrous (but largely hilarious) results. But Clark is still mooning over Lana throughout the season, while Lois spends half the season getting acquainted with charming billionaire Oliver Queen (Justin Hartley), a prep school rival of Lex who turns out to have as many secrets up his sleeves as Clark does. Their sassy repartee reveals a couple well suited to each other, but like most of the romances on this show, their blossoming love is threatened by the things they conceal from each other.

Even Martha Kent (Annette O'Toole) has a romantic prospect on the horizon, though in this first full season since the death of the Kent patriarch, her grief is too fresh for her to consider anything beyond friendship with the ever-enigmatic Lionel Luthor (John Glover). He is a powerful ally for her as she strives to serve honorably in the senatorial seat Jonathan won at such high personal cost. At this stage of the game, Lionel may be the most fascinating character for me simply because he's such a wild card. Chloe is the only other major player without an established destiny in Superman mythology, but it's a pretty safe bet that Clark's best friend isn't suddenly going to turn evil. Lionel, on the other hand, started out pretty rotten, and some of his actions in this season still seem reprehensible. But he also appears to be fighting for the side of good at times, and if nothing else, his affection for Martha is genuine. While his redemption would be ironic in the face of Lex's ultimate villainy, it would lessen the sting of that terrible transformation. Like Michael Emerson, who portrays the inscrutable Ben Linus on LOST, Glover constantly keeps us guessing with his complex performance.

In some ways, this is a very dark season. Lex's plans grow more and more grandiose and grotesque, and we learn in a flashback of a disturbing chapter in his youth. The Zoners wreak major havoc on some unsuspecting humans - not to mention the fact that there are still troublesome meteor freaks to contend with. The hustle and bustle of urban Metropolis can't match the comfort of bucolic Smallville, and an intrusive, oppressive score often ensures a skin-crawling sensation, especially in any scene involving Lex. On the other hand, new situations and characters inject freshness into the series. Many of the scenes with Lois and Oliver and Jimmy and Chloe are just plain fun, and it's a kick to see how the writers find ways of paying homage to these characters' forebears. Noir, an episode late in the season in which Jimmy dreams his way into a film noir version of his life, plays like a love letter to The Adventures of Superman. Clark has his own alternate experience with reality in Labyrinth, a much less aesthetically pleasing episode that finds him cooped up in a mental institution; reminiscent of LOST's Dave, in which an old friend of Hurley's turns up to inform him that the Island is all in his head, it allows us to see these familiar characters from an unusual perspective.

While I started getting tired of Lana's drama queen ways back in season two and always faulted Clark just a bit for overlooking the intrepid Chloe in favor of whispery, whiny Lana, giving her such intimate access to Lex puts her in an interesting position this year. Though she shows an alarming capacity for duplicity and vice, she also reveals the depth of her feelings for Clark, taking the character in refreshingly tender directions as she comes closer to figuring out just what he's been hiding all these years. Having Lois follow in Chloe's footsteps by writing for a tabloid is a fun way of bringing her closer to her journalistic future, and Chloe's bond with Clark is as solid as it's ever been, with one late-season development giving her role as his most reliable wingman even more creative possibilities.

Smallville grows more complex every season, sacrificing some of the innocence of previous seasons but creating a more intriguing web of plots and characters so that each episode is an important piece of the puzzle rather than being just a showcase for the meteor freak of the week. Will Clark ever don the famous suit and take to the skies? I can't wait to find out!

Smallville Thrives in Season Five

My brother just went back to college tonight. But before he left, we managed to spend quite a lot of time together - much of it parked on the couch in front of the television. In fact, in his last week home, Nathan, my parents and I blazed through the entire fifth season of Smallville, bringing us only half a season away from actually being caught up. It could possibly happen before the sixth season is over...

Season five is an important one. Interestingly, while the cataclysmic pilot episode aired a month or so after 9-11, this season's opener, which shows the immediate aftermath of yet another colossal meteor shower, aired about a month after Hurricane Katrina. The second-episode scenes of a community barn raising take on added meaning in that context, demonstrating the resilience of ordinary citizens under trying circumstances. If Smallville can be rebuilt - twice - maybe New Orleans can too.

In one respect, season five opens on a happier note than most; Clark's (Tom Welling) Superman training continues in the glorious Fortress of Solitude (though you'd think Jor-El (Terence Stamp) would've told him everything he needed to know when he abducted him for three months the year before), while Chloe (Allison Mack) is the awestruck bystander in the story of a lifetime. Only it's one she refuses to tell. And oh yeah, it's darn cold for a Kansas gal in a winter wonderland with no coat. So that beautiful scene is shattered when Clark insists on cutting his training short to get Chloe someplace where she won't die of hypothermia, to which Jor-El reluctantly agrees... conditioned upon Clark's return before sunset to continue his lessons. As soon as the words escape his lips, we know Clark will break his promise, whether out of forgetfulness, preoccupation or outright defiance. But his actions have grave repercussions, as he will come to realize as the season wears on...

Most inconveniently, this meteor shower brought another spaceship, a black, ominous-looking thing containing the Disciples of Zod. Lana (Kristen Kreuk) sees it land and is sufficiently traumatized; Lex (Michael Rosenbaum), who's on just about everybody's bad side at the moment, claims not to believe her, while swooping down with all his resources to take the ship for himself. But there still are those pesky disciples to deal with, and they cause as much trouble as possible, casually shooting fire out of their eyes at whoever happens by while searching for Clark. Who they find, or who finds them, and saves the day, with time to spare... and sticks around to see Lana regain consciousness rather than high-tail it back to his big bad dad, who made himself pretty clear, if you ask me. Of all the choices Clark made in the season, this very early one probably maddened me the most because it should have been a no-brainer. Lana's out of danger; he needs to go finish his eddication, dagnabbit!

Smallville is a mess, but it cleans up nicely, and Jonathan (John Schneider) and Martha (Annette O'Toole) once again manage to claw their way out of the surrounding rubble, though what ever happened to Jason Teague (Jensen Ackles) nobody seems to know or care. Even Lana doesn't raise any questions; maybe she's so unsettled by certain end-of-the-season revelations and events that she doesn't particularly relish another meeting with Jason. Nonetheless, it seems there should be some reference to finding his body under a once-hardy Kent table... or not finding it, leaving the possibility for his re-emergence at a later date. I'm guessing they just wanted to close the book on that whole season-four storyline, though, and I guess I can understand that. And they slip a reference to Pete (Sam Jones III) in the second episode, so maybe there's always a chance of a throwaway explanation of just what happened to Jason in, say, season seven, when everyone's forgotten him entirely...

Because who needs Jason when Lana and Clark can finally be together? The whole end-of-the-world thing has thrown things into perspective, and Lana realizes Clark is her true love, and since he rather conveniently (so he thinks) loses his powers after failing to return to his Fortress in the allotted time, he doesn't have to worry about hiding things from her anymore. Well, as long as she doesn't ask what he's been up to for the past 18 years... Chloe, meanwhile, finally knows just about everything about Clark that there is to know, and Clark knows she knows, so it cements their friendship even as she wistfully witnesses the renewal of his romance with Lana. And then Clark gets his powers back, as we knew he had to, though the circumstances are most unfortunate and don't bode so well for his and Lana's relationship. Chloe sure comes in handy as his wingman, though...

I continue to love Chloe in this season. She's pretty much done pursuing Clark, but she relishes her exalted place in his life, one of only four people who knows his secret - and one of them is quite out of the picture. There's a calmness and maturity to her here that comes out physically in her cessation of changing her hairstyle every episode. Maybe that has something to do with her not trying to get Clark's attention anymore; she really doesn't need to since he turns to her for help more often than ever, though when it comes to matters of the heart, one might suspect she'd rather not be the one to dole out advice.

Lana isn't so bad the first half of the season, though once her relationship with Clark turns physical - can we say ick? - she's suddenly all hormonally charged and coming on to Clark in practically every scene they share. Which is a problem for Clark since his abilities return soon thereafter, and he doesn't want to accidentally hurt Lana in the heat of the moment. And it's a problem for me, too, because... well... call me a prude, but ick once again. Plus, I'm still a hopeless Chloe and Clark shipper. The real problem with Lana here, though, is that Lex and Clark both get a glimpse of their respective perfect futures with her. And then things go horribly awry, leading both Lex and Clark to make tragic choices. Because in their blind adoration, it turns out they're both willing to give up anything and anyone for Lana's sake. Silly boys...

The Lex and Lana pairing grows increasingly plausible after she gets over her fury with Lex over his psychotic end-of-the-season antics and his subsequent implication that Lana's apparent spotting of the spaceship was all in her head, a result of post-traumatic shock. Because Lex decides to tell her the truth. Actually, ironically, as deceitful as he is, he's always been more forthcoming than Clark, and the fact that he is willing to share so freely with Lana here makes her question why she would want to stay with someone who's constantly lying to her. The thing of it is, I really want Lex and Lana to end up together. Because I really want Lex to be happy... and good, which I think he would be if he ended up with Lana, at least under a certain set of circumstances. And Lana would do all right, I think; he's obsessed with her and has endless resources with which to pamper her, so it's a needy girlfriend's dream. And, just as important, Clark could finally realize how perfect Chloe is for him... But none of those things can happen, and it's times like these when I hate the fact that the destinies of most of these characters are set. And then I'm grateful that at least nobody - perhaps, ominously, even the writers - knows where LOST is going...

But romances weren't my foremost concerns going into this season. Rather, there's the matter that certain characters seem unlikely to survive the series. Could this be the year one of them goes? Lionel (John Glover) starts off the season in an uber-creepy trance, sketching and etching Kryptonian symbols on any available surface. When he comes to, though - his lustrous hair nearly back to its full former glory - his first appearance is downright congenial. Soon, he still seems to be cooking up a few secrets in the shadows, but to what end? And when he offers to fund Jonathan's campaign for senator - against Lex, and behind Jonathan's back - can we really believe that it's not so he can strong-arm Jonathan if he gets into office, forcing him to make any number of decisions compromising his integrity? I cautiously believe in Lionel, knowing his manipulative skills are strong. I'm never sure just what he's up to, but the one constant, I think, is his deep, sincere regard for Martha, leading to some of the most moving scenes in the season, and as long as she is in his life his redemption seems to be within much easier grasp.

But Jonathan's opinion of Lionel certainly hasn't changed. In fact, his deep-seated prejudices against the Luthors frustrate me to no end, just like Samwise's refusal to embrace the glimmer of good in Smeagol, though in both cases there are very practical and compelling reasons for them to feel and act the way they do, far beyond sheer jealousy. Jonathan enters the senatorial race largely to keep Lex from getting the position, because a Luthor with all that power can't possibly be a good thing for all the hard-working middle class folks. What's more, he has a chance to crawl out from his son's shadow, to do something significant quite apart from Clark, and his pride embraces that possibility. But is it really a good idea to enter what's sure to be an ugly race with an enormous secret to keep quiet, not to mention a weakened physical condition? And what will happen if he learns where all that campaign money really came from? Jonathan is a hard-headed soul, and his attitudes poisoned Clark's relationship with Lex from the beginning, but he really is a man worth admiring, a role model absolutely instrumental to Clark's development. Hard-working, fiercely dedicated to his family and his values, he may just walk away with my vote for favorite character of the season.

Lex is on pretty shaky moral ground, but he hasn't turned into his father yet. He still resists the dark side, though his relationship with Clark is on the rocks, much to Lex's consternation. Clark's righteous indignation is a bit much to take, and the desperate attempts at reconciliation eventually give way to more and more bitterness. Of course, Lex is hiding a lot, as evidenced by the fact that he's always on his laptop, and he quickly closes it whenever someone walks in the room. But that doesn't mean he's past the point of no return, and this season affords him a couple of very heavy-handed opportunities to see the error of his ways and do something drastic to halt his gradual but relentless march toward super-villainy.

Lois (Erica Durance) continues to inject some much-needed humor into the proceedings, and the hints of romance between her and Clark are practically nonexistent here, aside from his general over-protectiveness whenever a potential love interest for her pops up. She, meanwhile, acts as a rather abrasive older sister, giving him a hard time whenever possible but also admitting her regard for him on certain occasions. More important at this point, she's utterly devoted to Jonathan and Martha, and she throws herself into supporting Jonathan's campaign with such fervor that he makes her campaign manager. Cool points to her for that. I'm actually really starting to like her...

A few new-but-familiar characters pop up this season, my favorite of which is Arthur Curry (Alan Ritchson), environmental vigilante extraordinaire who sweeps Lois off her feet, though Clark is right to suspect there's something "fishy" about him. Most significantly, though, we meet a gentleman named Milton Fine (James Marsters), though we know from the get-go what Clark doesn't: he's not really a history professor. He's a Kryptonian artificial intelligence, and he's bad news. But it looks like he's going to be around for a while...

Season five is pivotal: no more high school, no more Torch (though the Daily Planet keeps Chloe pretty busy), precious little camaraderie between Lex and Clark. Luthors and Kents both are caught up in the dangerous, exhilarating politics game, while a dark Kryptonian force looms as a threat bigger than even Clark can imagine. The hundredth episode rolls around; in honor of the occasion we get one of the most thrilling, devastating, emotionally charged episodes in the whole series. Major changes are about to occur, and many of them aren't particularly encouraging. It's nice to see Smallville cave at last and give us a warm and fuzzy Kent family Christmas before their down-home farm existence is thrown into a tizzy.

Most of the hints of Clark's grand destiny are rather grim, but there are also warm and wonderful moments of affirmation from both fathers and interaction with youngsters, for which Clark continues to demonstrate a remarkable aptitude. This is a season to tug at the heartstrings as events set into motion with decisions made long ago finally come to fruition and the days of dawning the fabled tights draw ever nearer. Though how Clark is going to explain the glasses to Lois, and more importantly, how she's going to fail to recognize him as Superman, I have no idea... I don't want the show to end. But I suspect the halfway point has passed; the epic scope of the season five finale will be hard to top, and how much longer can we keep Lex in check? I'm not sure. I am sure that it was a serendipitous day when Nathan toted home the first season eleven months ago, and I'm seeing this thing through to the end, marveling every step of the way.