Monday, February 9, 2009

He's Just Not That Into You, and She Probably Isn't Either

A few years back, Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo published He's Just Not That Into You to great acclaim. While it received its fair share of criticism, my best friend was a big fan of the book and thought it offered valuable advice, so she was looking forward to the movie. Though I hadn't read it, I thought the movie looked fun and was all for us seeing it opening weekend. It won't be nominated for any Oscars, but I found it a fairly entertaining romp through the maze of dating that many men and women navigate.

He's Just Not That Into You, directed by Ken Kwapis and adapted for the screen by Abby Kohn and Mark Silverstein, takes a self-help book and turns it into a romantic comedy with an intersecting cast of characters. Most often, bartender Alex (Justin "I'm a Mac" Long) serves as the voice of the book, doling out practical advice to the clueless-in-love Gigi (Ginnifer Goodwin), who can't ever seem to secure a second date. That function is also occasionally fulfilled by various clusters of gay men, the implication being, I suppose, that they are able to be objective observers to these little dramas that play out over and over. It's only one of the movie's many stereotypes; given the thrust of the book, though, I can deal with that. Each of the characters is being used to illustrate a point.

Alex and Gigi are probably the most interesting, rounded characters, but the movie never keeps the focus on anyone for very long. There are too many different stories to explore. We meet Beth (Jennifer Aniston), who has lived with her boyfriend Neil (Ben Affleck) for seven years and is growing frustrated with his apparent lack of interest in marriage. Conor (Kevin Connolly), one of Gigi's failed dates, doesn't know where he stands with Anna (Scarlett Johansson), whose affection for him seems to have cooled considerably. Little does he know that she's in hot pursuit of Ben (Bradley Cooper), a man struggling to be a faithful husband to the steady Janine (Jennifer Connelly) in the face of temptation. Somewhat removed from all this is Mary (Drew Barrymore), who uses the Internet to connect to potential love interests, though she ties in nicely by the conclusion.

In addition to all of these main characters, there are several unnamed folks - mostly women - who give testimonials about their experiences in the romance department. These are among the funnier scenes in the movie, as is the opener, which uses a playground disappointment to set up a lifetime of unrealistic expectations. It all seems very cynical at first, but as the film draws to a close, there are indications that love may not be so out of reach for at least some of these people after all.

One scene in particular produced a prolonged "Awwwwwwwww" from the female portion of the audience, prompting one guy to shout out, "You girls are so sad!" That statement could sum up the sentiments of a good chunk of the movie, which shows women going far out of their way to rationalize a man giving them the cold shoulder. By the same token, the men are generally shown as insensitive and full of brush-off tactics. There's about as much coarse language as a PG-13 film will allow. Then there's the fact that one of the movie's "rules" is, "If she's not sleeping with you, she's just not that into you." While other rules are refuted to some degree, this one never is, and it's bothersome that among all of these characters, not one considers abstinence a viable option. The whole thing makes the dating game look pretty unappealing and seems to me to support the idea that, as I've always suspected, it's usually better to just let a relationship develop naturally out of an acquaintance or friendship instead of actively searching for Mr. or Ms Right, one bad date at a time.

Some may find He's Just Not That Into You more relevant than others. While I didn't see a lot there that applies to me, it seemed like a reasonably insightful peek into the potential pitfalls of dating. The humor and strong ensemble cast make this a movie worth checking out if romance has you a bit down this Valentine's Day.

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