Watching a movie with my mom can be a very interesting experience. If
it's an action-packed film full of narrow escapes and violent
encounters, we can bank on her letting out at least three or four
screeches loud enough to rouse the whole neighborhood. If it's a
mystery, she's sure to spout several inquiries at the television or her
fellow viewers as to what is going on. But I don't think I have ever
witnessed her having a more vocal reaction to a film than she had to The Chumscrubber.
The movie came courtesy of my brother Nathan, who had seen it and raved
about it. Though he knew just what to expect from the ensuing scenes,
Mom and I had little idea what this indie had to offer. As it turned
out, what it offered more than anything else was ludicrously incompetent
parents. "Oh, my gosh!" Mom yowled, time and again, slapping her pillow
in dismay as the adults in this freakishly perfect community failed to
listen to a word their teenagers were (or weren't) saying. "These people
are such idiots!" She was incensed. Furious. Livid that even in
an exaggeration of reality the phrases "talking without speaking" and
"hearing without listening" could have such broad applicability. But if
Paul Simon had woken up one day in the world of this movie, he may just
have thrown up his hands in despair and called it a day.
The
movie revolves around Dean Stiffle (Jamie Bell), a surly, disengaged
teen who turns out to be just about the most normal character in the
film. After finding his best friend Troy (Josh Janowicz) dead in his
room, his already dreary life goes from bad to worse. His psychologist
dad, who's been shoving pills down his throat for as long as he can
remember, keeps pressing him for his feelings in the face of losing Troy
so he can incorporate his responses into his next book. Class punk
Billy (Justin Chatwin) and his lackey Lee (Lou Taylor Pucci) torment him
with re-enactments of Troy's death. Oh, and then they kidnap his
brother Charlie (Rory Culkin) so that Dean will be forced to retrieve
the drugs still stashed in Troy's room.
Except they kidnap the
wrong Charlie: Charlie Bratler (Thomas Curtis), a scrawny tuba-playing
geek who initially is rather amused by the proceedings, enjoying the
change of pace, particularly the attentions of Crystal (Camilla Belle), a
compassionate young woman who seems to be romantically attached to
Billy but is growing fonder of Dean by the hour. So the plan seems
pointless for a while until Billy refuses to release Charlie after
repeated requests and grows violent after Dean delivers the wrong goods,
thanks to some intervention by his real brother, who's such a twerp it
probably would have been much better for everybody if he actually had
been the one kidnapped.
While the film focuses on the journey
of these young characters through a wasteland of sugary suburbia more
garish than the neighborhood featured in the haunting Edward Scissorhands,
what had my mom shaking her fists was the parents, from Dean's
exploitative father (William Fichtner) and burnt-out, vitamin-obsessed
mother (Allison Janney) to Crystal's mother (Carrie-Anne Moss), who is
so obsessed with staying youthful that she competes with her daughter
for the attention of teenage boys, and from Troy's mother (Glenn Close),
who catatonically accepts casseroles while calling all her neighbors to
assure them, "In no way whatsoever do I blame you for Troy's death," to
Lee's parents (Caroline Goodall and Jason Isaacs), who refuse to pay
attention when he tries to let them in on Billy's plot.
Worst
of all, though, is perpetually busy Terri Bratley (Rita Wilson), who is
so occupied with talking a mile a minute while she works out the overly
complicated last-minute details of her wedding that she fails to realize
her son is missing. She's so insufferable, it's a good thing she's
balanced out by the delicate naivete of her fiance, mayor Michael Ebbs
(Ralph Fiennes), who's been in a bit of a daze since the unfortunate
tumble that introduced him to Terri. He recently experienced a sense of
awakening, however, thanks to a book written by Dean's dad, so while he
still seems confused, he wanders about now enmeshed in eccentricity and
awash with exuberance, eager to share his newly acquired vision - which
compels him to immerse himself in liquids and paint dolphins on the
living room walls - with the world. He is easily my favorite character.
But Dean and Crystal are pretty likable protagonists, and it's up to
them to break free of the constraints of their crippling surroundings in
order to do what they know is right. So this maddening, often
foul-mouthed, occasionally violent satire ultimately acts as a morality
play. And if my mom's screams of indignation are any indication, I think
they got the message across.
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